Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Blog Worth and the Kulit Natives

Ok here's the deal pare, I'm really annoyed now by some katutubo posers emailing me stuff on how they love daw other people's blog and that my dicklit daw is full of crapolas. The hell! I mean, my blog kaya is the real deal pare. I know it is not as boring as the Zafra site with her uber boring choice of words. And hell! Not even comparable to the pathetic blog of that Brian Fag. Not even close pare. Mine is waaaay too cool. Let the blog worth do the talking pare:

cofibean.blogspot.com = blog is worth $69,438.42.
bryanboy.com = blog is worth $186,298.20.
twistedbyjessicazafra.blogspot.com = blog is worth $234,284.10.

See pare. I mean, you're not so bobo naman to see the difference right? They've been blogging since forever na pero ako, I started last October lang pero the traffic was really overwhelming na and what's really katawa pare is that I'm not blogging everyday pa! What more pa kaya if my blog is like tagal na rin? That would be like million dollar worth of blog na pare. I was really lito na nga on the bulk of emails I'm receiving everyday. Sometimes nga I'm just deleting na lang lahat ng emails from my yahoo inbox dahil its soo dami na talaga.

And with regards to the google ads I put on my site pare, please lang, it's not uber studded kaya like the other pathetic blog/s I mentioned.

So, I guess you get the point na pare. I'm the real deal. True blooded writer here pare. And I don't even need to brag about my achievements. I'm made na kaya.

So yun na nga diba? I was really annoyed na sa mga loser comments and emails tapos my mom hired pa another driver for me. And I thought it was goodbye na to the native katutubo drivers. Shit talaga pare... I have a new driver na - Mang Hilario. Tang-ina talaga, the name would suggest agad na he's ancient na rin no. Stupid talaga my mom for hiring another old driver. I mean, she's blind ba not to realize na she's risking my life by hiring stupid old natives? The hell talaga pare. I mean is there anything more native and older than the name Hilario? Damn! I really need to get out uli of this country pare. I need to replenish my aura on another bansa to feel better. :(

139 comments:

Anonymous said...

"so yun na nga diba?" you are so asshole talaga.. Fuck you...Go to hell

Anonymous said...

i love you cofibean!
and i read that fag byranboy's blog and its not half as good as yours.
kiskis :*

Anonymous said...

Your blog is not funny :( It tries too hard. Better luck next time. -- Angie S.

metal-mouth james said...

i have nothing againts you but what goes around comes around. not now maybe, i guess some other time tomorrow. peace.

Anonymous said...

Don't mind those losers pare. Inggit lang yan sa blog mo. Dami talagang loser orcs ngayon. Glad we are both winners. Kudos to your blog pare!

yuck said...

"So, I guess you get the point na pare. I'm the real deal. True blooded writer here pare."

yuck you cant even finish one paragraph, even one sentence, just writing in srtaight english. if your having a hard time writing in straight english better write it in tagalog. Its not annoying and better.

virginnymph said...

u know cofi i think were relatives kaya.. send me ur pics nga if ur the one i think who you are... virgin_nymph_of_the_sea@yahoo.com, like oh my goshness with the gulay kaya nung sinabi ni sis na cuz ka namen.. with matching pics pa kaya pero i dont believe her kasi i didnt see ur pic pa kaya no like hello..

apoljuice said...

Not bad.. :D Your blog duzn't piss me off.. If any, it's making me and another blogger over there laugh like hell...

Hey, if you're really like that, I dunno what could happen.. But blog on, anyway! :D

More power and more posts.. and more millions to your worth.

By the way, I love coffee... cofi.. whatever...

Anonymous said...

cufiben, ples lang ha.. so uber mo nang inaapi ang mga katutubo gaya namen.. i men common, col naman kame deba?! kung wala kame, ala ka.. lyk neber mabubuhay etu blog mo.. tek ker poh..

love,

Orkie Tonyo

pretty said...

katutubo ka rin kayang maituturing.. napakakitid ng utak mo haha

Anonymous said...

i like your blog and i like the way you write...really funny :)

don't mind them - they're just jealous because no one reads their posts

pink_canadian said...

dont mind them, they're just jealous because no one actually reads their posts :)

i like the way u write... really funny!

Anonymous said...

don't mind 'em cofibean... these people talaga are full of crapolas and nervewracking inggit...

hail to cofibean!

Anonymous said...

Dearest Cofibean,

I love you. MARRY ME.

:D

.:+ Alyssa +:. said...

guys hating him wont make him misserable, ahaha, it'll only make him stronger, i think he's cool ahaha, i like his posts, always makes me laugh man.

Anonymous said...

unlike the blog of thatugly gay fag named bryan, your blog is definitely worth reading. bryanboy is a dipshit and he writes a bunch of crap pare. how dare the stupid katutubos to even compare his blog to yours.

don't mind the stupid natives pare. wala kasi silang taste for good lit eh... that's why they resort to the crap that bryanboy writes.. hahahaha sabagay, what do you expect from stupid farm-raised natives.. diba?

Character malfunction said...

juice ko, lord, cofibean, isa kang like that!

Mike Abundo said...

Like, don't make pansin those katutubos, man. Satire is, like, so sayang on the bobo.

Anonymous said...

wow it's pretty amusing that your blog title bears such a positive statement "make poverty history" and yet all your posts suggest we turn this into a reality by a mass "less- fortunate genocide". isn't this a rather whimsical idea borrowed from a south park script considering your self-proclaimed wisdom and literary prowess?
this blog has to be some sort of joke to piss people off...
true, you have the right to say anything you want...and i have the right to call it dim-witted. nuff said :)

Anonymous said...

i also need to replenish my aura on another bansa... was thinking of hk so i could do some shopping pero SHIT naman pare... i just remembered the baho domestic bitches there.. they're such an eyesore!

was thinking of singapore pero damn pare, they're also all over the place baka mahampas ko sila against the malinis na lupa of singapore.

sa australia din pare! daming posers na mga pinoy! they pretend to be edukados and the whole shebang pero obvious naman na they are tsimays. hahaha.

it seems that there is no escape from this katutubo invasion. haha anak kasi ng anak ang mga natives,lalong dumadami tuloy ang mga pangit sa mundo! SHIT!!

i hope there is an anti-katutubo organization somewhere in the world to gather all these natives into a nuclear test site. para katutubos will be nothing but history! haha agree?

btw, any suggestions as to where i can go pare? =p

peachy said...

if u are so cool and uber mayaman dapat u should not use free blogsite.. u should habe ur own IP address and own domain ...come one... you are trying to be mayaman because u r not so mayaman after all.... ahahahha....LOSER!

Anonymous said...

OMFG! Philippine economy is fueled by katutubos who left the country to work for the almighty yen, euro, dollar, etc to feed you face off. you should be kissing the katutubos' asses -- gago!

ederic said...

Your friendly cyberneighborhood katutubo here. Nakikibalita lang. :D

Anonymous said...

hi, cofi.
why don't you write your blog in pure english so you can really go international? you're blog is way cooler than bryanboy but he gets a shout-out from perezhilton.com just because they can understand him. now, if you can find a way to write your blog in straight english without losing your wit and your blog's bite, you can be internationally known! hopefully, you can find a way to do that. then all these stupid bobo orcs/native can shut the hell up!

Anonymous said...

Yeah Pare, I have a suggestion, why not just kill yourself and Cofibean, and meet Satan, so you can get rid of the eyesore katutubos, you're both pathetic feeling @ssholes.
=======
Anonymous said...
i also need to replenish my aura on another bansa... was thinking of hk so i could do some shopping pero SHIT naman pare... i just remembered the baho domestic bitches there.. they're such an eyesore!

was thinking of singapore pero damn pare, they're also all over the place baka mahampas ko sila against the malinis na lupa of singapore.

sa australia din pare! daming posers na mga pinoy! they pretend to be edukados and the whole shebang pero obvious naman na they are tsimays. hahaha.

it seems that there is no escape from this katutubo invasion. haha anak kasi ng anak ang mga natives,lalong dumadami tuloy ang mga pangit sa mundo! SHIT!!

i hope there is an anti-katutubo organization somewhere in the world to gather all these natives into a nuclear test site. para katutubos will be nothing but history! haha agree?

btw, any suggestions as to where i can go pare? =p

April 28, 2006 6:22 AM

Anonymous said...

haha. native katutubos literally can make world domination na! waahhh.. lets make history na cofibean. wahehehhe..!! =P

Anonymous said...

goshness, your blog is so coñotic. but i find it funny, really.

Anonymous said...

your right, youur blog in not comparable to brian fag's blog, not even sooo close.. you dont even have the guts to show your face, the real you. brian has all the reasons to brag. are you reading your posts? you cant seem to even construct a whole paragraph in english..

native said...

Hello. You know sometimes what you post here is not really that funny. Nakakainsulto na.

I hope you get what I'm saying Mr.Cofibean. Hindi ako yung mga nangagago lang saying na they love your blog. Look, if you're going to insult US natives, you'd better make sure that (1.) you're not living here in the Philippines and (2.) you're not filipino. Because we filipinos do not insult our fellow countrymen.

You should think about what you are saying. Not all think this is very funny. Some find it insulting. I really hope you are making all of this shit up.

Please Mr.Cofibean, if you are really smart and classy enough, stop this. This blog used to be cool. Now it's just some fucking blog of an asshole who thinks he's all that.

metal-mouth james said...

hey. i've noticed a lot of unusual behavior from a guy claiming that he's a filthy rich male.

1. not most male would even talk about those things that you are fond to call "katutubos" and "natives". MOST men don't enjoy criticizing other people like that. that's a job for girls and the likes. it's like your talking "parlor language" only in a taglish and funny manner.

2. if you're that "uber gwapo" and "uber rich" then how come you're single. this is just a stupid conclusion but isn't the perfect tandem? rich and goodlooking. girls and gays must have been drooling everytime you pass by. why single?

3. damn. pati nanay ginagago. you are a filthy, stupid bastard (or bitch?). to hell with you. even the relatives are enduring the nastiness that reeks from your mouth. grabe ka tol.

4. lam ko na kung bat wala kang pic. i wouldn't give mine if i were you. sana lang you're close to perfect kasi kung hindi, wala kang karapatan. are you this bored with your life that you enjoy making fun of those people that make up most of the population. talaban ka naman. sana lang hindi ka maghirap (if you're really that rich)

5. stop using "pare". wag ka na mag front. hindi kasi convincing eh.

6. it takes one to know one. how come you know all these "gay" things and describe them as if you have experienced it? duh? it makes sense.

7. lupit mo naman, parang wala lang sayo ang life ng iba. why don't you try to bangga us orcs or katutubos. try mo nga. lets just see.

8. lastly, it's either you're really that "gwapo and rich" or you're just another stupid, bored, confused and "nagmamayaman" na kung sino man na nagkataong may PC.

although i was againts this whole blog thing. i must admit that it was funny but then i realized that this was just a big pile of pretensions and bullshits.

ps. cge wag mo na tong idisplay. may kakilala ako sa GMA. try ko ngang i send and URL nito. i'll just let them do their jobs.

what goes around comes around. ambilis bumalik ng karma ngayon.

Katie said...

i think those people who bash you are just not in the same level as you are.
just continue writing cofibean.
and don't stoop down to their katutubo levels aryt? =)

Anonymous said...


hey there faggot cofibean...
your so kadire kaya, u look like a katutubo for sure.. the hell pare, yucky kaya your uber pathetic face.. im sure u look like a dangwipe next to a monkey.. i hafta send na nga my driver (apparenly, your dad) to give me back the pc i gave him.. duh, it went kaya to a filthy social climber like u are...
kadire ka pare.. u make me sick..

fuck u asshole..

go on get a life of your own.. everything thats been written in your blog are purely CRAP and IMAGINARY... stop making it as if u have sense, when actually u dont even have manners

maybe u dropped out of your GMRC (good manners right conduct) class...

tsktsktsk

such a bobo person...

do u have a bank account?
so i could send u money to buy yourself some manners. hahaha

Anonymous said...

Cofibean,

Why are you so mean? I mean is there any good left inside you? Bakit parang lahat gusto mong awayin? I know you have the right to say your opinion. But please be responsible enough. With freedom comes great responsibility.

Antonete said...

You suck bigtime dude! Fuck you!

Anonymous said...

You suck bigtime dude! Fuck you!

Anonymous said...

I think this blog is just all satire. In shoirt walang totoo dito maliban sa isang ilusyunadong callcenter faggot na nagfefeeling mayaman. Sige makarama ka sana sa mga pinaggagawa mo sa mundo. Indio!

Filipino Ako said...

Guys, bakit ba kayo nagpapa apekto sa siraulong ito. Siguro dapat sa blog na ito ay iboycott na natin. Masyado kasing bumababa ang moral natin pag pinapatulan lang natin sya. Lumalabas tuloy ang pagiging walang pinag aralan natin. Meron na nga syang disclaimer diba?

Anonymous said...

I think your blog rulez pare! Keep it up!

Dreamer said...

Hahahahaha! Tama bang pati si Jessica Zafra at Bryanboy ay kalabanin?

Anonymous said...

I think your blog is way cooler than those two blogs cofibean. I love the air of mystery and the hidden message you put on your words. Ang galing. Four thumbs up ako sayo!

Anonymous said...

Mamamatay ka ring animal ka! Kantutin ka sana ng mga construction worker at pasukan ng malaking tubo sa pwet! Animal ka! PAKYU!!!!!!

Atenean27 said...

If you are really a graduate of Ateneo or Brent, please have some decency to at least show some manners. Be responsible pare. nakakahiya sa alma mater natin.

Anonymous said...

Siguro anak ka ng nanay mo sa driver nyo noong si Mang Tonyo. Nakakalungkot nga lang dahil wala na sya ngayon sa inyo. Hindi mo ba namimiss ang tatay mo?

Callboy said...

Shit ka cofibean!!!! Bakit moko ginaganito? Ano bang ginawa ko sayo para ganituhin mo ako? Mahal na mahal kita tapos ginagago mo lang pala ako! Matapos mong pasabugin ang pwet ko ay basta basta mo na lang ako aalispustahin. Magbayad ka ngang bakla ka! Tang-ina ka! - Q.C. Callboy

Anonymous said...

Mr. Cofi, I dig ur writing style. Ang galing. Kakaiba. Keep it up! Isa kang henyo.

Anonymous said...

Hey ihatecofi bakit hindi mo na lang gawing libro itong blog mo. Para siguradong maging mayaman ka nga! Mukha kasing ikaw ang poser at hindi kami. Masyadong trying hard.

Imbyerna said...

Naiinis ako sayong bakla ka! Pakyushet ka sa earth!

Anonymous said...

I think this blog is just a big joke.

Anonymous said...

Mas gusto ko pa rin ang blog ni Jessica Zafra dahil doon kahit papaano ay may natututuhan ako. Hindi tulad dito, nabobobo ako sa English ko. Shet!

Anonymous said...

Mabangga ka sanang hitad ka!

West said...

At least we callcenter agents earn our money the decent way. Unlike you na I think ay nakukuha mo lang ang pera mula sa pinaghirapan ng magulang mo. Isa kang linta na walang magawa sa buhay kundi humihingi ng humingi ng pera sa mga PILIPINO MONG MAGULANG. Kung ayaw mo dito at kinakahiya mo ang lahi mo ay lumayas ka. Hindi ka din kailangan ng Pilipinas. Ikaw ang amag na kumakain sa nana ng nabubulok na karne ng tigyawat sa mukha ni Zoraida. Pwe!

Chuvalu said...

Pakita mo na kasi ang fez mo cofibin para naman magkaalaman na kung ano ba talaga hilatsa nyan. Nakakasuspense na eh.

Anonymous said...

Very funny. Lol! Love the orcs! You gotta love em! LMAO!

Anonymous said...

Looking at the brighter side, I found this blog very entertaining and interesting—guilt-free, perky and trendy site haha. Mga dude nmn, mr. cofibean’s just expressing his thoughts and not to impress you with it. Unlike those pretenders and super-wanabees *yuck*, they just merely want to impress.
Seriously now,we all have our own unique paths to take, so let this guy walks his own road for no one walks d road better than himself for he alone rULes his own destiny, so are you—SUCKERS!.

/iambrew said...

Giving him nagative comments won't do anything. As you might have figured out by now, he won't budge so why hell care. And why read this blog if you're so affected by it? Admit it, you somehow take pleasure from reading his posts.

As for me, I enjoy reading his posts. But that does not necessarily mean I agree with everything he says. NO. I just take them as an amusement and release from a long day at work.

So stop bugging and just enjoy.

Don't you just love me? Wahahaha...

/iambrew said...

Giving him nagative comments won't do anything. As you might have figured out by now, he won't budge so why hell care. And why read this blog if you're so affected by it? Admit it, you somehow take pleasure from reading his posts.

As for me, I enjoy reading his posts. But that does not necessarily mean I agree with everything he says. NO. I just take them as an amusement and release from a long day at work.

So stop bugging and just enjoy.

Don't you just love me? Wahahaha...

LUX said...

hi!!! your blog was recommended by my officemates!!! i read it... cool!!! quite a few have the courage to express themselves as what you're doin'... other are "pikon" with what you're saying, but i think it's ok... blog mo naman yan eh, nakikibasa lang sila... *wink!

LUX said...

hi!!! your blog was recommended by my officemates!!! i read it... cool!!! quite a few have the courage to express themselves as what you're doin'... other are "pikon" with what you're saying, but i think it's ok... blog mo naman yan eh, nakikibasa lang sila... *wink!

Anonymous said...

the truth really hurts... I was a previous fan of yours cofi, but since you don't update your blod everyday, i came across this blog of bryanboy, at first out curiosity, hated it in fact, but i must admit, I BECAME AN ADDICT and and avid reader of his blog. Its simply BETTER than your blog. Sorry pal, its your fault.

Anonymous said...

if u were just dreaming........ keep on dreaming... nakaka enjoy ka pala pag nanaginip ka ma trigger ang writing prowess... keep it up dudette!

Pax said...

Make poverty history? Dear God. You're as ignorant as you are an asshole. This blog isn't the "real deal". It's filled with all the shit in your head you obviously have a hard time putting into words. Just take a look at your fucked up grammar. 'Pare?' 'Kaya?' 'Talaga?' God. You sound like those "katutubo" and those homosexuals (Oh, wait. Don't you know the meaning? Look it up. It's in a book called the Dictionary and you can probably find your picture under "Dickhead".) you insult. You think you're so high and mighty, but you should take one good look at the mirror and see that you're deluding yourself into thinking that you're above them. You are pissed at them because you can't accept the fact that you are EXACTLY like them. You're the same shit you so vehemently despise.

And you should be thankful your mother cares about you 'cause she's the only person in this planet who wouldn't shoot you point blank. God, I feel sorry for that poor driver 'cause he's going to work for an ungrateful son of a bitch like you! Besides, what 22 yr. old male would still need a driver for? You're running a business and you can't drive a car? Awww...I'm sure Mother would allow you to drive one some day once you actually show some signs of intelligence.

You're right about one thing, though. You should get the hell out of this country and don't ever come back 'cause there sure as hell isn't enough space here for the blimp that is your head.

Morrigan said...

Your blog never fails to make me laugh. Neither your serious nor just making things up, you're getting a lot of attentions alright! Hahaha! You're really a good writer. So good that you're getting through them, making them hate you or like you. Not to mention receiving death threats? And just look at the comments!

Keep it up! ^_~

imbeginningtolikecofibean said...

my god yung iba dito talagang pinagbuhusan ng panahon yung mga sinabi nila lol talagang ang hahaba! wala akong ma-say kundi iba ka cofibean, iba ka! lol

Anonymous said...

You are so so funny cofibean! Bobo orc ka nga talaga! Hahahahaha!

Anonymous said...

You should go replenish yourself in some other country and never come back.

You may be all high profile here in this blog-whatever-the-hell-it-is but in the real world, you're but a pimple in the face of the world.

And a 22 year old man who's filthy rich and sosy can't even write a sentence in straight and understandable english or drive himself around? Who spends his time dissing his own countrymen and comparing his blog's worth with others?

Get a life.

Or better yet go jam a rifle up your ass and pull the trigger.

Wala kang kwenta, bakla!

Janis said...

Kawawang mga sensitibong hindi makakita ng satire kahit nasa ilalim na ng ilong nila.

Hehe, nakikibalita lang

Anonymous said...

Lord almighty! You plan to shift to creative writing and you write English this way? I wonder how you talk in English, I bet you speak the way you write. Talk about proficiency!

No my dear, you're blog is not boring, it's completely laughable. Maybe you should stick to accounting or whatever hell you are studying now because Microsoft Word is not gonna help you with your English.

Yeesh! And they say this is an English-speaking country and here you are speaking like a Neanderthal!!!!

jessica said...

wow pare! i don't know if i'm going to laugh or cry. pero, while i'm undecided, keep it up na lang muna.

---------------
if you were to choose, you would rather be:
a. taxicab
b. anything
c. pinoy
d. a movie
e. a rumor

Anonymous said...

you actually write some of those comments that praise you, don't you?

figures. only people like you bask in the stench of their own shit.

Anonymous said...

Haha! Tama bang iadvertise ni Jessoica Smith lahat ng blogs nya dito. Bakit? Wala bang bumibisita sa site mo Jessica? Lol!

Anonymous said...

Iba ka talaga cofibean! Ang lufit mo!

Trinidad Perez Tecson said...

Guys, bakit ba kayo nagpapadala sa katangahan at kagaguhan ng cofibin na ito? Obvious namang satire lang ito. Please lang.. magtulungan po tayo. Iboycott natin itong blog ni cofibin. Sana wala ng magpost dito. Kasi everytime na nagpopost tayo ng comment, I think we are feeding his already inflated ego. Kaya ang dapat ay maghawak-hawak tayo at sumigaw ng sabay-sabay! Katarungan at pagkakaisa para sa masang Pilipino!

Angat pinoy! Year 2006 na! Magtulungan tayo sa isang makabagong adhikain! Patayin ang mga pesteng sumisira sa magandang imahe ng ating bayan! PATAYIN!!!!

Anonymous said...

hey cofibean dude...i think you should enroll in some english classes...you're grammar is so annoying

Anonymous said...

To Trinidad Perez Tecson.

I have no problem with this blog of "satires" which, unfortunately for this cofibean (sic) idiot, is actually not. It's merely a blog of bloody gripes, if he only read enough intelligent literature he would know better than call his "writings" satires. What annoys me to kingdom come is running across blogs that uses language thats right down there with Jimmy Santos English. (But at least Jimmy Santos is a commediane, this cofibean is nothing but a pretencious fuck!) You know, it's actually good that people write about noticeably bad things about Filipinos and the Philippines, I believe that it keeps us on our toes but PLEASE!!! not from someone who doesn't seem to have enough gray matter between his ears to speak decent Tagalog or English. I will probably keep checking this blog and writing my comments and insulting the daylights out of this pathetic fuck until he decides to exit cyberspace to learn better Tagalog or English. It's just my pet peeve to hear or read Taglish. He can write as much as he want but he has no place in Cyberspace if his only got half a brain for English or Tagalog.

So you Tecson dearest should keep cool and keep your mind open to criticism. It's more constructive that way than to constantly believe that the Philippines is such an underdog. It isn't, it's just that it is populated with people who have just half a brain... like this cofibean.

Anonymous said...

To all the people who criticizes and who would criticize this blogger's grammar and use of the Engligh language:

Just make sure your own grammar is impeccable.

Prime example--the anonymous poster above me. I'll just point out some (of the numerous) errors in his/her grammar and in his/her use of the English language.
1) "cofibean(sic)"

Is there anything wrong with "cofibean" such that you had to put "sic" there? It's a person's handle/name. It can't be wrong. It's cofibean's chosen "name" as an author of this blog. If that's the spelling he/she wants, again, it cannot be wrong.

2)"intelligent literature"

I didn't know literatures have I.Q. Wrong adjective to describe literature. I know of some intelligent people. Even some of my pets are intelligent to a certain degree. But from the hundreds of books I've read, I can't, for the life of me, describe a single book as "intelligent." Then again, I haven't tried talking to any of my books. Maybe if I did, they will talk back and show some "intelligence."

3) "commediane"

Check the dictionary. Nuff' said.

Those are just some of my favorite examples from the post above me. They're my favorite because to me, it shows the author/poster is trying to show his/her wit using the English language. Instead, I find it down right pathetic because he/she is criticizing another's grammar. It seems like the classic example of the pot calling the kettle black, eh?

I'm not defending nor advocating for this blogger. I'm merely pointing out my observations. If you're going to criticize someone, make sure you have no fault of your own.

I didn't want to criticize anybody here. I know I make mistakes, too. What I did here was merely to point out the errors I noticed.

andre said...

konting tao lang ang nakakaappreciate ng ganitong way of writing... Ang masasabi ko lang... There's nothing offensive when writing... Kung kayo naooffend...Suck your mama's tit kasi mga bobo orcs kau...Opinion nia to mga tsong... Kung magpapadala nga kayo... Maliit nga mga brains nio...might as well eat dog food gaya nung nabasa ko hahahaha

andre said...

bobo orc ang di makaappreciate at maniwalang may ganitong klase ng tao... kumain na lang kau ng dog food... para malagyan ng nutrients ang so katiting brain nio hahahaha!

Anonymous said...

"There's nothing offensive when writing... Kung kayo naooffend...Suck your mama's tit kasi mga bobo orcs kau..."

I don't know why.. napatawa ako as I was reading this that air blew out of my nose. I'm glad I wasn't eating rice or drinking anything at the time or it would have gone out my nose. Haha.. ^_^

-Ranmamaru (who also believes that this whole blog is a satire)

Anonymous said...

*sigh* wala pang bagong post...

Anonymous said...

To anonymous who answered my post:

cofibean?

I said sic because it is an eyesore to use words that are supposed to have proper spelling. HANDLE or NOT it is idiocy, it's not even an abbreviation!

intelligent literature?

YES!!!!! there is such a thing as "intelligent literature". Hello???

Commediane?

What? You mean the spelling??? Which dictionary did you check? FYI it's spelled in four different ways. Hello? Why don't you go check too. So you actually checked the spelling of this word just to find mistakes in my post? You actually bothered? You actually wanted to prove me wrong? Cofibean is that you?


"I'm not defending nor advocating for this blogger. I'm merely pointing out my observations. If you're going to criticize someone, make sure you have no fault of your own."


Yeah!


Nuff (SIC) said.


The correct spelling by the way is e-n-o-u-g-h.

You didn't get my previous post don't you? You didn't even get why I put "(sic)" after cofibean. And no I'm not proving I'm a better English speaker or writer. Not at all. I just have too much time in my hands and I have enough time to hate blogs written by half wits.

Anonymous said...

To anonymous who answered my post:

cofibean?

I said sic because it is an eyesore to use words that are supposed to have proper spelling. HANDLE or NOT it is idiocy, it's not even an abbreviation!

intelligent literature?

YES!!!!! there is such a thing as "intelligent literature". Hello???

Commediane?

What? You mean the spelling??? Which dictionary did you check? FYI it's spelled in four different ways. Hello? Why don't you go check too. So you actually checked the spelling of this word just to find mistakes in my post? You actually bothered? You actually wanted to prove me wrong? Cofibean is that you?


"I'm not defending nor advocating for this blogger. I'm merely pointing out my observations. If you're going to criticize someone, make sure you have no fault of your own."


Yeah!


Nuff (SIC) said.


The correct spelling by the way is e-n-o-u-g-h.

You didn't get my previous post don't you? You didn't even get why I put "(sic)" after cofibean. And no I'm not proving I'm a better English speaker or writer. Not at all. I just have too much time in my hands and I have enough time to hate blogs written by half wits.

tres said...

re: cofibean (sic), i have to agree that there is nothing wrong with it so why put "sic". whether is was sore to the eyes or not, it was spelled right.

re: commediane, i have checked dictionaries online but can not find the word.

maize said...

bryanboy's site is read worldwide. he obviously has guts to show his face and is known, even cited in foreign publications.

jessica zafra, meanwhile, is the jessica zafra. her work's been published too.

as much as you have freedom to avail of free space in blogspot or any other portal, i think you ought to evaluate yourself and your statements very carefully.

and besides, their sites have ads and earn because they are definitely read by more people and are popular ... more popular than you.

too bad, you're actually entertaining and funny. but your inflated id, ego and superego just ruins everything. tsk tsk.

/iambrew said...

No new posts yet?

Bryan Anthony the First said...

wish ko lang di self-incriminating mag post d2...

keri lang, di naman me na-offend, napano naman mga other bloggers... mega react, hello!! blog kaya, lalo't free blog pa...

self censorship is my rough advice (rough advice daw o) ayaw nyo, di wag basahin... as if naman, mag pop out itong site nya kung di nyo i click click dba?

pwede bumati? hello iambrew at anonymous (kaw din ba yung anonymous na mega away kay homer ng FUQ?)

Sisa said...

hey i think youre better than bryan boy.. his posts are all blaaaah. but maybe you could try writing in straight english.. it ought to get more attention coz having tagalog words mixed up in an english paragraph is so frustrating if you wanna try understanding the text. but if youre not really planning on topping blog worth, then.. stick to your style and write on ;)

Anonymous said...

wow...its been a while since ive been here...bout 2 months..you people still come to this borign site..its the comments noh?..well..i still have a huge UTEN

Anonymous said...

Yo, I really laughed at your blog. It's so damn funny.

Don't mind those pricks insulting you. They're just jealous coz you have a lot of..."people" coming here.

Just post on amigo...just post on...

Anonymous said...

Ginahire man ako ni mama mo as bagong drayber kasi ako man bago niyang chinuchupa. sensya ako man ayaw ko mag maneho dahil ang lakas ng libido ng INA MO. ginapapagod ako ng INA MO. minsan silayan mo puki nia dahil magang maga na.


- Mang Hilario

pennylane said...

ahaha. matagal nako lurker, pero hinde ko matiis...sasabihin ko na!

COFIBEAN,

I heart YOU! <3

Hehehe. Cross my heart. :)

siniseryoso ka ng mga tao dito. haha. eh obvious naman na satire to. baka naman friends kayo ni CHONAMAE BANAAG? or sister mo sha?mamamatay nako sa kakatawa sayo. dapat may insurance ka sa readers mo. siguro ikaw din mamamatay matay sa kakatawa pagnababasa mo yung mga comments dito. :P

teka, bakit galing sa call center ang IP mo? haha! :D

bobo-hater said...

2)"intelligent literature"

I didn't know literatures have I.Q. Wrong adjective to describe literature. I know of some intelligent people. Even some of my pets are intelligent to a certain degree. But from the hundreds of books I've read, I can't, for the life of me, describe a single book as "intelligent." Then again, I haven't tried talking to any of my books. Maybe if I did, they will talk back and show some "intelligence."

^^^lemme just comment on this. ang tanga ng argument na to. speaks of how maleducated and how many books he/she has already read. they wil talk back? nyak. if you are driving at being sarcastic, no, you didnt achieve it. its simply baduy and stupid. hehe. and OMG, you can't for the life of you havent described a single book yet as intelligent? hehe. ano binabasa mo, SWEET VALLEY HIGH? bwahaha! :P

Anonymous said...

Yo, cofibean...write English straight! If you want to speak in Tagalog, then fine...write it straight! You know, blogs like this just show foreigners just how fucked-up the English is in the Philippines. And you have the right mind to even say you are a Filipino (in your profile) after all your attacks towards..."the katutubo?"

I don't hate you. I hate how you think!

If you feel that the real indigenous Filipinos are "dirty" then why not change your citizenship?

l'haineux said...

dearest mr. cofibean (if you're really a mister... well i think you're a 'brokebacker') you talk about intelligence when you yourself have none... only a dingbat like you (and your minions, if they DO exist because i surmise you just made up the comments which are in your favor) will call people of your own blood as 'bobong orcs'... then you just called yourself a stupid native because you speak the language... you're trying hard to be a foreigner but you're going to die with that 'bobong orc' blood in your veins... if you hate it so much to mingle with filipinos then why not flee to antartica where no filipino in sight will piss you... as long as you speak and know the language you're still a filipino...
about the worth of your blog... d'oh... wake up, so much for your hallucinations... people are actually reading it for sheer entertainment... we find you and your entries rather dense and shallow... look around there are blogs way better than yours... the layout is sleazy and it seems that you don't know much of HTML to at least give it a little lift from the mud...
oh ms. pennylane... i took a minute to think about what you said "siniseryoso ka ng mga tao dito. haha. eh obvious naman na satire to"... i don't think so... i guess a normal person who is really running a family business would not find time to update such a stupid blog, pouring out vehemence and sarcasm over the filipino race...

Anonymous said...

Uhh, hey. I was just wondering. If you're not as bobo as what you claim to be, then maybe you would at least know the difference of numbers from what your blog's worth to the other sites. lolz. please lang pare, before you jump into your profane conclusions, read your equally profane entries. Ah well, opinion lang po. Guess you're open to comments right? + bryanboys's site worth is higher than yours then maybe you'd realize it'll be prominently that way. All because his blog has substance. Yours is plain... entertaining.

lolz. I actually like reading your posts. Just for fun. =D

peace, guys. =D

Anonymous said...

waaaah. ang conyo. =p

aika said...

haha! mas nakakaaliw 'tong mga comment kesa sa blog entry per se.

Anonymous said...

I have to agree with TRES and with the anonymous poster he/she was referring to in his/her post.

Regardless of the spelling being an eyesore, you only put (sic) if the spelling is wrong. Precisely it's his HANDLE, it CANNOT be wrong. Ang kulit ng bobo hahahaha

I have checked the spelling of commediane as well. I haven't found any that is the same as "commediane." Maybe you can direct us to a dictionary, online or otherwise, so we can see for ourselves that you are correct.

When the poster wrote "Nuff," I knew he/she was using slang for enough. I think you're the one who's stupid e-n-o-u-g-h to have to point it out.

To the poster above--
Ang daming mong sinabi pero lahat unjustified. Wala ka man lamang rason kung bakit tanga ang argumento niya.
For me, he/she is correct. It is grammatically wrong to use the adjective "intelligent" for inanimate objects. Pwede sigurong "thought provoking literature" or "insightful literature."

NUFF' said hahahahhaha

AC said...

Funny blog, especially those recurring themes - katutubo, etc etc. I demand more frequent posts!

machismo said...

sabog ka na naman cofibean haha.

believe in everything u read?? nahh thats stupidity! double haha.

Jego said...

Ho-hum. It was rather amusing at first, but after you've read one of the posts, you've read them all. Looks like the author's creativity paddled up Shit Creek and then bailed the canoe.

Mike Abundo - yup, it's me. Hope you've been doing well. And allow me to correct you, as well as those who think this blog is some kind of satire: "Satire" by definition is an essay with social relevance. Something this blog is utterly devoid of, unless you consider blatantly insulting language to be "socially relevant."

Oh, and I work in a call center. And I'm proud to have earned my managerial position, unlike others who can't seem to get employed unless their parents run and own the company. But then again, what's the opinion of a "katutubo" to this guy, right? ;)

Anonymous said...

bat mshado ka against sa mga katutubo?..*hms!

Momel said...

You're good and freaking hilarious! Cheers!

Anonymous said...

@aika, hello?! taga UST ka nga. pano naging "grammatically" incorrect ang intelligent literature? intelligent is an adjective and literature is a noun in case hinde mo alam dahil bata kapa at taga UST ka nga. hehe. :P narinig mo na yung figures of speech? oh baka hinde nyo pa napapagaralan yun? tska baka hinde mo alam na may tinatawag na coining of words and adjectives? OMG. mga pastoral talaga kayo tumula. hehe. :P

empress maruja said...

^Hey, that's way out of the line.

anyway, i can't comment on your blog just yet. too much "katutubo" in a post can be a bit tiresome, you know?

amicaaaaa said...

i love bryanboy!

Anonymous said...

ok nung umpisa. but it seems that our dear old cofibean is losing his touch...

Nagiging redundant na yata. Wag ka papaapekto sa mga mura, man. Nasisira yung creativity mo.

lateralus said...

if people hate you so much, why do they keep coming back for more? haha. hypocrites!

Jhed said...

oo nga...

it seems you are losing your touch na... o baka naman the orcs kidnapped you na! haha. bring us back cofibean!

Anonymous said...

satirical ata ito sa paraan na sobrang patama ito sa mga konyong nilalang sa pilipinas na may makitid na pananaw sa mga kapwa-nilalang nya na nakatira dito. pwede rin siguro na konyo rin lang tlaga sya, pero mahirap malaman sa net ang mga ganung bagay. :D

a very concerned citizen said...

Hello. Someone recommended me to this blog and I laughed at it. Not because it is lame (my blog cannot be recognized as "a blog") but because of the way this guy cofibean writes and organizes his thoughts. I've only read his blog once and I can't wait for his next post so I can laugh at it until my ribs break and I lose all my air (sarcasm). But what the hell are bobo orcs? What is your problem with your drivers? Drive or ride public transportation! Or you're too "classy" to ride a jeepney? And you compare yourself to Jessica Zafra. Amazing guts you have man (or woman...I'm not sure about that). And you want to replenish yourself in another country. Stay there if you want to escape the torments of the "katutubo and the bobo orcs." You sound like a child who was raised by cross-dressing whores and made you watch re-runs of Lord of the Rings. Don't take my word for it, this is all opinion, or you don't take the opinions of "natives?"

I really hope that you don't talk like the way you write in your blog in public, unless you insist in making your image as a man change.

This is all opinion. I'm not telling everyone else up there to think the same way as I do.

Anonymous said...

you're so tagal naman in updating.

Anonymous said...

Hey, just my advise, try to put something more "positive" stuff, I assume you were born here, so that makes you a native too, if not then have some respect to the people who owns this country. I know, you can put everything in your head here, but be considereate of other people. I came from a very prominent family, but I do not act nor react like you. I was born here, I admire hardworking people, drivers, call center agents, etc. because they stand for their own, they dont go look for "Mommy" if they need something. Call center agents are working people, cut them some slack, maybe in one juncture in your life, you'll be asking help from them, you'll never know. By the way, try to live a simple life, you cant take your money and properties in heaven.

Anonymous said...

Gwapo ka kaya? yabang mo e! TSK!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

hey buddy youre the worst! stop this shit... i think youre insane! you need professional help dude!

Anonymous said...

Funny, pero bading na bading ang humor!

sublime said...

Bryan and your's both sucks.

As in eeeewwww...

But i think i dont have to stoop this
low... I am not that lowlife!

Anonymous said...

Omigosh, I'm loving your blog! Laughtrip! Woohoo!

This blog is shiznit! Want to talk dirty, cofibean? :D

Anonymous said...

'Wag ka ngang makinig sa lahat ng nanlalait sayo... Papansin lang sila... I always read your work, and it's really interesting!

Other people are just making a big deal of what you right.

Ang babaw ninyo, tumawa na lang kaya kayo?

Peace sa lahat! At cool lang kayo, masyado kayong hot na hot...

Anonymous said...

hey, you forgot to "blog worth" xiaxue.blogspot.com. she's bigger than any of those 2 other blogs you've compared yourself with.

lol.

Anonymous said...

cofibean is not stupid. he uses satire to get to us. cant u guys notice he's using some highfalutin words that are all spelled correctly (or most of the time, for that matter)? he's just making these things up and gets paid for it. i dont really believe him. this is just his satire.

Anonymous said...

oy, titing supot, nangate
beklog ko kakatawa sayo
hahaha!!! tangna ka, me pa
aura-aura ka pang
nalalamang hindot ka eh
mabaho din naman ang utot
mo, bayoyoy!

meron ka pang pa orc-orc eh
di ko pa alam kasimbaho mo
si gollum, tangnang hindot
na to! hahahaha!!! mabuti
pa ako american citizen na,
ikaw, baka visitor's lang
ang visa mo, eh bulbol mong
ahet! ahahahaha!!!

palakihan na lang ng tite
pards! palibhasa malaki
lang sayo yang kaliwa mong
beklog kase yung sa kanan,
sing liit lang ng iklog ng
pugo hahahaha!!!

mag jakol ka na lang, dude hahaha!!!

Oxford_dudette said...

hey cofibean!i have never ever read a blog like yours. OMG!seriously, no native orc posing as an extremely fashionable glitterati has enthralled my attention for so long! where else but in the philippines can you find a closet-queen living in Big Bucks Daddy's shadow "running" a family business, not to mention probably having mum wipe those wittle teaws away, evewytime the old baho natives drive you insane.
Get over it fool...your nothing but a pretentious 'urbanite' bitch, who's homophobic. Get a clue, dude, your single. You cannot even write in straight english. Satire my ass. Dou you even know what the word means? How about you talk of something more substantial than 'baho' smelling natives like you. I mean you are probably ugly like hell that's why you try to over compensate with your money and all that material shit.
Hit me when you get to London and you hang around with all us intellects over at Oxford. Maybe we'll throw you over the Thames, it might do you good.But then again, you might never get a visa...oh well i guess you'll be stuck there.
Oh wait pare, did I mention Filipina ako, Bulakeña pa...a native who's way better than you'll ever be! cheerio!

Anonymous said...

my god poor boy! tsk tsk. Your making fun of yourself. Skwater!

Coffee bean said...

Oh, here's someone even more stupid than cofibean!:

"cofibean is not stupid. he uses satire to get to us. cant u guys notice he's using some highfalutin words that are all spelled correctly (or most of the time, for that matter)? he's just making these things up and gets paid for it. i dont really believe him. this is just his satire."

Tsk, tsk... Unfortunately, this is probably the only reading material you can get your hands on! Damn dude, what satire are you talking about, there's none here AT ALL. But then again, this cofibean blog exists because of pure, unadulterated idiots like you and people like me who enjoy reading about idiots like you. Man, this is a sick, sick, SICK! cycle!

Anonymous said...

ok!. kill your mom instead, for having a child like you!.. hahahhaha.. get lost.. oo nga pala pare.. your so chuvachenes ha.. nakakahawa ang eclavuh.. hehehhe.. keep it up.. :D

mikekaokao said...

First of all, congratulations to you. You've made yourself as famous (or infamous) as you hoped you could be.

You admitted that what you're writing is a satire and I believe you've achieved your goal based on the comments posted here.

However, I believe you realize how people are going to react and you fuel that by spinning outrageous remarks after another. Why? This may be a thesis you're working on to see how people will react to downright cruelty to one's culture and social standing.

By posing as an ultra-rich socialite who looks down on the less-priviledged 'masa', you've evoked the primal reactions in each and everyone reading your posts. They can be broken down to the following:

1. Rage/Indignation - Those that reacted negatively towards your posts. They feel that you attacked them personaly and reacted accordingly. They are the ones who took your remarks as an affront not only to them but to the whole nation. By using words such as "baho" and "katutubo" you have degenerated the Filipinos.

2. Amusement - Those that did not take your blog seriously but found humor in your posts. They may or may not believe everything you say and claim but they definitely did not take offense to your writing.

Personally, I don't believe the things you write in your blog. Let me list the reasons why:

1. You generalize too much. There are no details to support your stories. You also do not support your statements. As a writer (which you claim to be), you would know that.

2. You revel in the attention you're getting. If you were truly annoyed with the comments that you receive, you would have closed this account and opened a new one. Also, you knew how people would react to any insult (you've watched Pinoy movies and teleseryes too, I'm sure) and you continue to inflame their ire.

3. You have a one-dimensional topic: the degeneration of everyone around you. I don't recall you say anything nice about anyone (aside from yourself). You've insulted every Filipino, including your mother.

4. You exert too much effort to flaunt how rich you are to the point of exaggeration. If you were as rich as you claim to be, you wouldn't be as conscious of your possessions as you seem to be.

Bottomline, you got everyone interested to read your blog and you enjoy it. Conratulations again.

A word of advice directed to the others who put their comments here: Please exercise better judgement in writing down your comments.

I know it's painful to read things that are insulting to one's nationality, culture and social standing but it would be a great testament to us Filipinos if we don't lower ourselves by competing with the writer on who's better at throwing insults. Come on, we're better than that!

To those who ride on ihatecofi's coattails by emulating and copying his words and insults, please don't let this go out of hand. We might wake up one day when insulting one's own heritage is acceptable and considered cool. We have enough problems as it is. Let's not add demoralized nation to them.

mikekaokao said...

First of all, congratulations to you. You've made yourself as famous (or infamous) as you hoped you could be.

You admitted that what you're writing is a satire and I believe you've achieved your goal based on the comments posted here.

However, I believe you realize how people are going to react and you fuel that by spinning outrageous remarks after another. Why? This may be a thesis you're working on to see how people will react to downright cruelty to one's culture and social standing.

By posing as an ultra-rich socialite who looks down on the less-priviledged 'masa', you've evoked the primal reactions in each and everyone reading your posts. They can be broken down to the following:

1. Rage/Indignation - Those that reacted negatively towards your posts. They feel that you attacked them personaly and reacted accordingly. They are the ones who took your remarks as an affront not only to them but to the whole nation. By using words such as "baho" and "katutubo" you have degenerated the Filipinos.

2. Amusement - Those that did not take your blog seriously but found humor in your posts. They may or may not believe everything you say and claim but they definitely did not take offense to your writing.

Personally, I don't believe the things you write in your blog. Let me list the reasons why:

1. You generalize too much. There are no details to support your stories. You also do not support your statements. As a writer (which you claim to be), you would know that.

2. You revel in the attention you're getting. If you were truly annoyed with the comments that you receive, you would have closed this account and opened a new one. Also, you knew how people would react to any insult (you've watched Pinoy movies and teleseryes too, I'm sure) and you continue to inflame their ire.

3. You have a one-dimensional topic: the degeneration of everyone around you. I don't recall you say anything nice about anyone (aside from yourself). You've insulted every Filipino, including your mother.

4. You exert too much effort to flaunt how rich you are to the point of exaggeration. If you were as rich as you claim to be, you wouldn't be as conscious of your possessions as you seem to be.

Bottomline, you got everyone interested to read your blog and you enjoy it. Conratulations again.

A word of advice directed to the others who put their comments here: Please exercise better judgement in writing down your comments.

I know it's painful to read things that are insulting to one's nationality, culture and social standing but it would be a great testament to us Filipinos if we don't lower ourselves by competing with the writer on who's better at throwing insults. Come on, we're better than that!

To those who ride on ihatecofi's coattails by emulating and copying his words and insults, please don't let this go out of hand. We might wake up one day when insulting one's own heritage is acceptable and considered cool. We have enough problems as it is. Let's not add demoralized nation to them.

Anonymous said...

your blog makes me sick har har

Anonymous said...

i hope mang hilario stabs you to deatH! hehehehe!! if mang hilario relly does exist!! ehhehe =)

Anonymous said...

you claim to be writer but i see no evidence that you are. you use the language of what they refer to as "coño"..you do know the meaning of the word, its spanish and i assure you, you wouldnt like the meaning.
your pulling off your stint in the expense of other people--actually, of the whole nation. Didn't our mother teach you ethics and morals? Oh, lemme correct that, you dont even respect your Mom.
I hope you're happy with what you're doing because clearly you are not entertaining ALOT of people. individuals entertained about this type of degradation of one's own culture is as pathetic as you are.

Anonymous said...

Writer? go to hell. ano bang problema mo sa mga kapwa mo Pilipino? Pilipino ka rin tol, lahat tayo natives. Sige lang, insultuhin mo ang sarili mong kadugo, parang iniinsulto mo na rin ang sarili mo.

Pwede ka bang magsalita ng tuwid na tagalog o English man lang? Saka alam mo ba na ang pinakamalalang pwedeng gawin ng isang blogger ay ang ipagmalaki na "cool" o malupet ang blog niya. Sabay kinumpara mo pa sa ibang blog.

Saka hindi pwedeng masukat ng "blogworth" kung gaano kahalaga ang blog mo. Mas importante yung mga laman. Madaming bumibisita sa iyo dahil sa pagiging sucker mo, hindi dahil gusto nilang mabasa ang blog mo.

Kayo ang mga poser, pinipilit niyong alisin yung totoo niyong balat. Kung ayaw mong maging Pilipino, tumalon ka nalang sa bangin. Samahan mo sina George Bush at ang lahat ng mga racist sa buong mundo.

Anonymous said...

hehehe..kewl lang peeps... its just a fictitious blog by a conjured writer who dreams that 'he/she' (kasi di tiyak ang kasarian) is that rich... hehehe.. let 'he/she' dream on... :(|)

Anonymous said...

HaHaHa! LoVe YaH bLoG!!iT reaLLy maKes mE LaUgH!!

Anonymous said...

youre a loser & an asshole for calling your mom stupid. tangina ka pare, nanay mo iyan! maybe SHE'd be better off if she hadnt given birth to an asshole like you! ,,|,,

kurikaboo said...

haha ang dami kasi nagbabasa ng basura dito.. haha pakiwalis na nga yang blog na yan.. waste of time.

some gay trash talking over here..

bading na bading..
well baka experiment lang nya to hehe


pinagttripan lang nya ang mga tao kung papatulan ang mga pinagsusulat nya.

Anonymous said...

pasenshahan nyo na yung katutubong si cofibean. mejo nataboy ata ng tribo nila. make some life work, wag lagi sa gay bar.

death said...

may paglalagyan ka din poser, tandaan mo yan.....

baho orcs said...

dumb bunch of weirdos.

Anonymous said...

His the stupid or YOU, but I think thats you. Your acting like a uneducated person. Go to hell big damn ashole. papatayin kita pag nakita kita.