Friday, April 14, 2006

Kadiri Places this Holy Week

Ok pare. Just stayed home this Holy Week because orcs are like scattered almost everywhere nowadays. I mean, I made a list na nga on where not to go to this Lenten Season.



1. Boracay : This is a big nono place for sosy people round this time. The place is literally littered with baho natives and bobo orcs. The buhangin is very panghi na rin around this time of year because of the ill-mannered natives who's making paikot-ikot pa sa sand. Yeah... literally spreading skin diseases and baho smell sa buhangin. So if you're still kulit and made punta pa rin to bora, please don't forget to wear your thickest flip flops and make dala na rin alcohol to rid yourself of some skin diseases coming from the baho natives. A gas mask is also a must! It's better to enjoy na lang the beach on TV. That's what I did pare, I just recorded na lang Bora the last time I went there. So I am now enjoying the beach minus the natives and orcs right at the comfort of my own room.



2. Puerto Gallera : The bakla-mecca during this time of year. It's like all the baklas from all over the Philippines do a pilgrimage to this place every Lenten Season. So expect loud, flambouyant and baho people along the beach. The shoreline pa will surely be shit-laden because of the luwag ng butthole of those gay orcs. Damn pare! I bet that if a terrorist will blow this place up round this time of year, 99.9% of the bakla population here sa pinas will be like sent na to oblivion. As in wala na. So if you're looking for a quiet place to make dasal this season, literally avoid this place pare. Sayang lang your sandals if you stepped on some gayshit.

3. Bus Stations/Piers : Here is where all the baho loser natives make siksikan to go to the province during this time of year. The vile-stench of the general masa is really evident here. So it is really advisable to bring some cotton balls dabbed in alcohol to put inside ur nose to at least filter the filthy air round this places. Hirap na panahon now pare. I think 95% of natives are carriers na of some hybrid airborne diseases. So stay away from these places. Mura lang kaya domestic flight nowadays to anywhere sa pinas.

So there pare. I made na my top 3 places not to go to this holy week sa pinas. So, if you really care for your skin and your well being, STAY AWAY from these places. But if you have pam-Belo, I guess its ok lang to indulge and have fun. Just don't forget to take at least 1,500 mg of Vitamin C to protect yourself from the native diseases you might get. Mas better if you go to a private resort na lang to enjoy fully your summer vacation.

Enjoy.

71 comments:

tenchu said...

Puerto Gallera : The bakla-mecca during this time of year

--you got that right haha!

Anonymous said...

"Puerto Gallera : The bakla-mecca during this time of year

--you got that right haha! "

yeah tenchu, you should know...
hahaha! *kidding*

Anonymous said...

woohooo!!!
i love ur blog!!!
especially d puerto galera part!!!

Anonymous said...

pare, your right, bora right now is infested with orcs and talagang no no for sosy people like you. uber kadiri na tlaga there. pare, how did u know about these kadiri things nga pala? been there? tell me more about the orc infested piers and puerto galera never pa ko been there eh.you know pare you are the only gliteratti i know who's always in contact with the mabaho orcs.

pls enlighten us.

Pierrot Bonnaz Bolneze said...

you are just sooo damn right! haha! nice work. i looooove it.

Anonymous said...

this is the first time i learned about galera as gay mecca, is this true?

Anonymous said...

Shit!!!

Ang ganda ng Post na 'to..
You're back.. really really back from outer space...

Nakakatawa and also nakakapagtaka at the same time.. ewan ko kung bakit pero.. nakakaenjoy talaga..

Eh ang Enchanted Kingdom ba dapat puntahan? Kasi di ba ung mga Public Schools ay doon nagfifield trip? hehehehehe.. dun kasi kami pumunta ng mga friends ko.. dami tao.. mga public school students..
dapat ba puntahan iyon..?

Just Asking..

Wannabe

Anonymous said...

WOW.. Puerto Gallera is Gay Mecca....

Pano un.. Siguro kasapi ka.. hehehehe...

Anonymous said...

Ano ba yan, ang dami namang epal dito. Sabi nga ni cofibean, wala kayong say here sa blog nya. Kaya asa pa you all no!

Btw, mr. cofi, please post more often!

Anonymous said...

Ano ba yan, ang dami namang epal dito. Sabi nga ni cofibean, wala kayong say here sa blog nya. Kaya asa pa you all no!

Btw, mr. cofi, please post more often!

//////////////////////////////////

Eh tanga ka pala.. sabi mo walang say tapos ikaw nagsasabi ng wag mag post.. hehehehehe.. sino kaya ang pakielamero dito.. hehehehe..

Siguro gusto mo gumawa ng blog tapos gagayahin mo style niya... hehehehe... isang malakaing kabaliwan... KAPAL MUKS!!! hehehehe

Anonymous said...

E TANGA KA PALA E! GUSTO MO SAKSAKIN KO NGALANGALA MO?

iloveyoucofi said...

hahahahahahah omg funny ka talaga cofi!

i love ur posts (and shempre tong site mo).

cute ka kaya? nakakaintriga ka talaga! tara, kita tyo =)

Anonymous said...

Ang tatanga nyo talagang lahat! Kaya hindi umuunld ang pilipinas dahil ang bilis nyong maniwala sa mga satyre na tulad nito. Obvious naman na bobo ang nagsulat nito. Kakahiya! Mamundok ka na lang dude or better yet, try to brush up on your grammar. Mali-mali kasi. It was really anoyying.

Anonymous said...

aNNoying! anoyying ka jan lol

Anonymous said...

post more. i love the comments.

Anonymous said...

glad you made this list! i'll just pamper myself this summer in a spa or something.. nice posts cofi.

Anonymous said...

omigosh i really love your posts...update some more...just cant help myself from reading

i love cofi not said...

kung para sayo ang puerto galera ay lungga ng mga bakla bakit di ka na lang dun nag vacation? swak na swak ka dun! tangna mo! gago! taga-call center ka lang pala! hudyo!

kunyari ka pang taga private school. ulol. gago

shamyr_kawaii@yahoo.com said...

hey question! are you a gay or sumthin?

sam said...

hey are you a gay or sumthing??? no offense aryt?

Anonymous said...

cofibean makes me super horny!

Anonymous said...

master ihatecofi,

thank you for posting once again. been looking forward to your latest words of wisdom. we have been like wanderers in the desert yearning for the day you bless us again with your expert advice. without your precious insights, we are like cactus (cacti?) without water, like a horseshoe without a horse, like a bookmark without a book (not even kislap or wakasan komiks).

your mere existence continues to enrich our petty, miserable lives. we are not worthy!

Anonymous said...

kakaiba ka! Ion lang! :)

Janis said...

how... heartwarming.

Anonymous said...

hhaayyzzz.. tagal ko inintay update mo... uber busy ka ba?? (obviously).. buti nalang nakapagupdate ka na... as in.. batong bato na ako dito kakabasa ng ibang blogs.. walang makapntay seo.. stig ka :D... lolz.. neweiz, i don`t mind if ur grammar is wrong because it just adds to the fun this blog brings.. lolz...

take care cofibean...


visit mo naman embassy.. dami koreano/a dun.. hehe.. and.. (unti lang orcs dun)... a place for someone like u (elite)

Pandaemonaeon said...

Walang Mang Tonyo bashing? >:(

Gawa ka naman ng write-up sa mga brace-wearing baho native drag racers! They're so like baduy and pasikat you know? And they make emit emit pa nang pollution with their hulugan na Ford.

Anonymous said...

wow..hmm..i was thinking of putting up a tent in the manila bay..could you give me your advice? how many stars would you rate that?..........i mean i coudl shit and piss anywhere and rape the squatting for cheap sex..what you think?

Anonymous said...

what the hell is wrong with you??? natives? what are you then, better than the rest of society? you should be ashamed of yourself, posting condescending stuff like that. and that goes for all you fans of this so called sosyal faggot who tries in vain to hide his insecurities through this blog. pathetic.

Anonymous said...

i love you cofi!

Anonymous said...

COFI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i love you! but i love bryanboy more!
nakakabobo basahin tong blog mo!

magupdate ka naman! :)

Anonymous said...

amazing...

laftrip ung posts...
demet Rolling on floor laftrip ung comments!!!...
errrr... dont worry bout those guys who are aggresively... aggresive... you just kinda hit them and well the guilty ones react defensively... nyahah...

parang pag may umutot sa elevator... yung sumigaw ng "SINONG UMUTOT???" paraniod guilty... =D
huli ka gago kaaaaa waaaahahahah

laftrip hahah!!!

Anonymous said...

amazing...

laftrip ung posts...
demet Rolling on floor laftrip ung comments!!!...
errrr... dont worry bout those guys who are aggresively... aggresive... you just kinda hit them and well the guilty ones react defensively... nyahah...

parang pag may umutot sa elevator... yung sumigaw ng "SINONG UMUTOT???" paraniod guilty... =D
huli ka gago kaaaaa waaaahahahah

laftrip hahah!!!

Anonymous said...

I love you cofibean! You rock! :)

Anonymous said...

"Makes me wanna puke all over the Philippines to know that there are still people like you wandering the islands..."
- J.K. Rowling

Anonymous said...

this is my first time to read your royal conyoness blog. i love the way you talk and bash those baho natives. haha. you're so conyo, i wanna puk-pok your head na and sakal you.

Anonymous said...

Nice review. Dapat nilalagay mo yan sa Yahoo Travel para pang worldclass ang dating. Wakekeke!

Anonymous said...

Baka ikaw ang pasabugin kong bading ka! Hoy! Tita! Para sabihin ko sayo, kaming mga bakla ang pag-asa ng mundo! Mas masipag kami kesa sa mga batugang straight na tulad mo (kung straight ka nga talaga). And para sabihin ko sayo, mababait kaming mga anak! Kundi dahil sa amin ay hindi uunlad ang Pilipinas. Ikaw na rin ang maysabi na malaking porsyento ng callcenter ay inookupa naming mga 3rd sex. Pwes, kaw na din nagpatunay na kami nga ang bumubuhay sa ekonomiya ng Pilipinas dahil kung wala ang mga callcenter ngayon ay baka lubog na ang Pilipinas! Kaya wag mo kaming mamaliitin. Baka pag kami ay naberna sayo, uubusin namin ang lakas mong hitad ka! Tignan natin kung hanggang san ang ibubuga mo! Kung gusto mo naman ay suntukan na lang. Hindi kita uurungan kailanman, saanman at anupaman!

Ikaw ang salot sa lipunan! Hindi kami! Tangina mo! SALOT! BAKLA!

Anonymous said...

huy cofi, bakit wala pa rin yung mga posts ko? pls iapprove nyo naman. wala namang ganyanan.

Anonymous said...

Hay naku! Pinapasakit mo lang ang ulo kong bayot ka! Magstreight english ka nga! Obvious na bobo ka kaya hindi mo alam ang tamang grammar.

Anonymous said...

Shit-laden beach! Hahahahahaha! Very funny!

Anonymous said...

its GALERA dude... not GALLERA... masyado kasi nagpipilit... tsk tsk tsk

Anonymous said...

Boracay will never be the same since you left it. It has become the ORC travel spot because of you! You're the King of Orcs that brought your followers to our beaches.. bastard!

poseur. said...

some people have too much free time.. one way to burn is blog nonsense.

some people have too much free time to read. whattafun.

taboo to go to galera on holy week. orc infestation nga. but worse is baguio. gahd.

Anonymous said...

oh gosh cofibean i know you're an asshole but you're a fuckin funny asshole bwahahahaha

Anonymous said...

poseur. said...
some people have too much free time.. one way to burn is blog nonsense.

some people have too much free time to read. whattafun.

taboo to go to galera on holy week. orc infestation nga. but worse is baguio. gahd.

April 18, 2006 5:17 PM

******************************

tanga aka ba? hehehehe
ang baguio kaya ay bundok kaya puro katutubo dun. may gahd gahd ka pa. hehehe. isip-isip
saka pakelam mo ba. sa iyo ba iyon????

cofibean suckz said...

hahaha ei cofibean baka gus2 mo ausin ung baluktot english at s2pid grammar mo kc mas mukha kang illiterate kaysa sa mga native ka22bo.. u judged all the orcs why don't try to look at urself u r more so so super damn better than them... cguro nga bakla ka and so very panget ur ugali so as ur face (^^,)

Anonymous said...

hahaha ei cofibean baka gus2 mo ausin ung baluktot english at s2pid grammar mo kc mas mukha kang illiterate kaysa sa mga native ka22bo.. u judged all the orcs why don't try to look at urself u r more so so super damn better than them... cguro nga bakla ka and so very panget ur ugali so as ur face (^^,)

Anonymous said...

lol at all the jologs natives here, just looking at your reply you are all pathetic losers.. haha, you are all so stupid to not see through this guys lame flamebait, proves how stupid most filipinos are :P hahaha :p props to coffi for luring all the jologs internet users of the philippines, hahahaha

JojoM said...

i escaped to San Francisco CA.

I dont go to local places kaya for vacation..

hehehe said...

Cofibean,

You rock. I swear you do. I can't understand why people hate you for being conyo though.

BTW, nice post. The thing about Boracay is true though. And I heard there are gay prostitutes there too.. Hahaha

dale_21 said...

fuck y'all pussies

SANITY said...

sinu ba talaga yung mga nagpopost dito? sabi ng kaibigan ko group of girls lang daw toh? inaalay daw sa mga conyo? eh bakit nagpepretend pa na maging lalaki?

illuminati said...

is that it?bora lang ang galera lang alam nyo na pwde magbeach?wow naman kala ko this person is conyo and he grew up sa US..if u know the sophi paris hilton then look for her so called hotel and spa along with white sand bars...search for it...if you can't, poor you!

avon hates y'all said...

ahahaha!!!! i like the way you call those poor people! i thought la nang mas malala pa sa dukha...meron pa palang katutubo and native bahos!...i enjoy reading your blog...makes my day complete..hehehe...i sent you a friend request in friendster..hope u accept it...ur like so awesome kya like every thing you said 'bout fags are xo xo twue...hehehehehe

Anonymous said...

whatever. how did you know na their buttholes are maluwag pare? you talaga you have been making silip the butts noh? hahaha

Anonymous said...

poor you! what the hell are you talking about? hopeless ka na... go and have some psychiatric exams!

Anonymous said...

check ur facts orc!1500 mg urself!ur not a physician or pharmacist! i bet u dont even know wats vitamin C

Anonymous said...

ewan ko ba sa inyo...mag-away kau kung gusto niyo tatawanan konalang kau!!!!

Anonymous said...

ba't alam mo na madaming bakla sa puerto bading ka rin siguro,madumi ang buhangin sa bora siguro may athletes foot ka at mababaho sa mga pier,bus siguro IKAW YUNG KATABI KONG MABAHO YUCK!!! your so ka-ka...kakabwisit...nyahahah...filing sosy SUS...alam mo ba na ang tae mo eh mabaho din...yuck so kaka-kakasuka....pertaining sa blogger...at sa mga filing sosy na ang tae ay mabaho pa sa tae ko...mga kupal ng lipunan...patuli muna kayo...hehehe...

Anonymous said...

hahaha.. as if naman ur sosy talaga... funi mo a.. baka naman u hav mirror in your damn haus and make tingin your face..

baka ur one of the bobos in bora and galera...hehehe.. funi db lyk your face....

and why mo naman nalaman na there are many gays in puerto cguro your one of them,or probably nakasama mo na sila ng one nyt...

ewwww.. so kadiri ka.. hahaha.. luk ka sa mirror huh... your filing sossy kc... e wala ka namn class...

Anonymous said...

Hoy gago! Tangna mo! pa- gay mecca ka pa.. KASAPI KA DUN! Kaya ayaw mo sa Bora kasi waLa kang pera papunta doon! at wag kang masyadong mayabang.. PAPATAYIN KITA EH! mata-pobre!

Anonymous said...

hey ill just have a word about your gay mecca thing! i was hurt with what you told about that! may be i can not be as rich as you. or as great as you. pero you dont have any right to step over any sexuality. yup, i belong to the gay sexuality pero natatangahan lang talaga ako sa mga taong kagaya nio about that. siguro pag pumasok ka sa UP youll be OPENED to the fact that gays musnt be treated like that.. and not all gays are that na butas na butas ang pwet! haler. i am many years gay na pero ni katiting wala pang pumasok dun!

are you a catholic? are you schooled?

para sabihin ko sau. hindi purki sinabe sa katoliko na imoral ang gawaing bading e hindi yan dapat maging basehan ng pang-araw araw na gawain. walang basehan upang yurakan ang pagkatao!naintindihan mo ba? o sadyang bobo ka? MAGINGAT KA SA PANANALITA MO! OR ELSE IREREPORT KITA SA BLOGGER! IPAPATANGGAL KO TALAGA SA AUTHORITY ANG BLOG MO. KILALA MO NAMAN SIGURO ANG MGA UPIAN! HINDI IMPORTANTENG MAYAMAN PERO MATALINO AT MATAPANG! DI KAGAYA MO, BOBO AT DUWAG. PANGALAN LANG TINATAGO PA!

pero i just have to defend the gays here as part of the UP.

but anyway i love your other post. i just didnt like how you dissed the gay people. sobrang naiinis ako sau sa part na un. ok k n sana e.

Anonymous said...

hey ill just have a word about your gay mecca thing! i was hurt with what you told about that! may be i can not be as rich as you. or as great as you. pero you dont have any right to step over any sexuality. yup, i belong to the gay sexuality pero natatangahan lang talaga ako sa mga taong kagaya nio about that. siguro pag pumasok ka sa UP youll be OPENED to the fact that gays musnt be treated like that.. and not all gays are that na butas na butas ang pwet! haler. i am many years gay na pero ni katiting wala pang pumasok dun!

are you a catholic? are you schooled?

para sabihin ko sau. hindi purki sinabe sa katoliko na imoral ang gawaing bading e hindi yan dapat maging basehan ng pang-araw araw na gawain. walang basehan upang yurakan ang pagkatao!naintindihan mo ba? o sadyang bobo ka? MAGINGAT KA SA PANANALITA MO! OR ELSE IREREPORT KITA SA BLOGGER! IPAPATANGGAL KO TALAGA SA AUTHORITY ANG BLOG MO. KILALA MO NAMAN SIGURO ANG MGA UPIAN! HINDI IMPORTANTENG MAYAMAN PERO MATALINO AT MATAPANG! DI KAGAYA MO, BOBO AT DUWAG. PANGALAN LANG TINATAGO PA!

pero i just have to defend the gays here as part of the UP.

but anyway i love your other post. i just didnt like how you dissed the gay people. sobrang naiinis ako sau sa part na un. ok k n sana e.

Anonymous said...

Tama, kayo lahat, pero ung sa bading part...tang ina ninyo, mamatay kayong mga bading, manghihigop ng lakas!!! Mga linta ng tite!!! Gago, magpaka totoo, tingnan nyo ang pagitan ng singit nyo kung sino kayo! Mga ulol!

Anonymous said...

hoy anonymous ng june 23 TANGINA MO! BOBO! WAG KA MAGGENERALIZE NA ANG MGA BADING AY LINTA NG TITE! PARA SABIHIN KO SAYO! THATS ONLY INFERENTIAL STATISTICS. U CAN NOT GENERALIZE A WHOLE FROM ITS PART. NAINTINDIHAN MO BA!? BOBO! BOBO!

Anonymous said...

haay, cofibean, wala kang magawa. o ano masaya ka na sa mga comments? come on. i know it doesn't matter to you kung ano ang mga pino-post. if i know, natutuwa ka whether it's positive or negative feedback. at least napapansin posts mo. gusto mo lang maka-catch ng attention at mapansin. yung iba naman dito, fanatic mo. andami talagang cheap sa mundo.hehehe.

haaay again, cofibean. i don't care about your sexuality. it's not a big deal if this blog is totoo or fictional lang. so cheap. attention-seeker. wawa ka naman.

Anonymous said...

hindi ba bading karin ?

kaya pala naka-attend ka ng pilgrimage sa puerto galera eh !

congrats !

Anonymous said...

tingin ko
mas masangsang pa rin ang kaluluwa mo
kaysa sa mga katutubong masang
iniinsulto at minamaliit mo.
with love,
proudpinay01

romzkee said...

Stay clean (holy) this Lent:)

I think more and more Filipinos are avoiding the beaches already during Holy Week.

Caught my attention said...

I'm not trying to be sarcastic but damn! i don't care about the negative things you said or the negative and positive comments you got, but you sure have some kick-ass blogs going on here. and your motto is right off the walls.. really deep ika nga!

more power to you pare! keep it up!

Anonymous said...

you brain dead red neck a$$hole! - i wanna meet you and stab a cock on your mouth 10 times. hahahha
anyway, i know you really are gay!