Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Tim Yap and Harry Potter

Ok pare, Claude invited me last night sa Big Buddha, GB3 for her to make pakilala na her new boylet. Lets call this guy "Tim Yap". Tim Yap not because he looks like my friend Tim Yap but because its an abbreviated form of Tang-Inang Mukha Yan, Ang Panget. Seriously speaking pare, he reminds me of "Shrek". As in upclose and personal! Complete with the BO pa! Kulang na lang for me to take pa-picture with this guy and show it to my mom and tell her that I've been to Disneyland last night para pareimburse ng tickets no.

Ciempre diba, since Claude is my friend, I need to make pa-plastic na naman and make her feel na she's like panalo sa new boyfriend nya no. Yeah pare, she's panalo allright... Panalo for finding the most stupid kupal sa earth. As in! Grabe kasi pare the hangin of that guy. I mean, its obvious na he don't have any idea on who I am diba pare. So I just made tahimik na lang and tried to focus more on making ilag na lang from all the tilamsik of his laway no. And you know what? I kinda enjoyed din naman what I did eh. It's like playing PS2 pare in real life!

So yun na nga diba? It was really horrible talaga last night and kinda tiring din faking my tawa. Pero the hell talaga pare the yabang of that guy. Buti na lang Hilariously stoopid called and asked kung san daw ako daanan. Ciempre diba, that was an opportunity na to put an end sa kayabangan of Tim Yap. So I told Hilariously Stoopid to just park the car and pick up the books I bought at Powerbooks earlier. And I made it a point that I spoke louder that usual over the celphone last night so that Tim Yap would hear it and for him to have an idea that I have a slave no. Unlike him na just hitching lang a ride with Claude. How pathetic was that? Lousy no?!

Also, Mother of all kainis talaga some loser punks who got into my nerves for the past few days dude. As in TANG-INA talaga pare! Uber pampasira ng aura. It was kinda hard na to approve comments lately because of some loser punks who keeps on posting the complete "Harry Potter" series at my comment box no! Complete with foreword pa! As in... Kulang na lang pare the video attachment of the whole movie to complete the effect. Why not kaya make sama na rin the trailer to the attachment and the biography of all the cast para naman wasak na talaga my aura pare and para naman you could laugh na infront of the camera na together with your mean kopita because you somewhat managed to ruin my mood diba? As in the hell pare! Asa pa you no! Obviously, this is another agenda na naman of some bakla natives who have nothing to do but mess with my blog. Its simple lang naman pare diba? If you don't like what you see here then why stay pa? Not unless you're really that stubborn to make your kadire comment pa! Tang-ina, you're bobo talaga! I removed the button na nga coming from pinoytopblogs to lessen the katutubo hits tapos you're like flocking pa rin. I mean, read the disclaimer you dork!

102 comments:

dalaifollower said...

--->> I mean, read the disclaimer you dork!

well said cofi ! (applause!!!!!)

lifeisabitch_1 said...

finally!




i have nothing against harry potter pero guys c'mon!
posting a picture as a comment?!
absurd and pathetic. "stupidity at its finest."

Anonymous said...

I think what he meant by the Harry Potter series is that buong book ang pinopost at hindi photo. Mukhang hindi ka nagbasa lifeisabitch. :D I'm an avid fan ni Cofi and almost everyday ay nagbabasa ako ng bagong comments. There was a time before na merong nagpopost ng buong Iliads sa comment box nya kaya moderated na ngayon. Hirap magscroll down at sobrang tagal magload dahil sa posts na yun. Goodthing sinasala na ni Cofi ang mga comments ngayon kasi dati puro away lang andito at spam ng mga walang magawa.

Anonymous said...

...walang magawang tulad mo, ko, nating lahat. mabuhay ang mga walang magawa! yan ang pilipino!

CarinyaBrutal said...

You Fuckin' Rock Cofibean!

Billycoy said...

nice, may new term akong natutunan sa iyo! TIM YAP, dami nga niyan dito.

Bwisit na mga commenters yan, pati ba naman book pinangko-comment pa. They should make their own blog tapos dun na lang nila ilagay yun, at least may free reading pa sa mga audiences nila.

mel said...

hahaha! you got me laughing so hard, cofibean! :) mind if i borrow your 'tim yap' term? hahaha! loved it!

lifeisabitch_1 said...

ok...got it..don't wanna justify my mistake though but thanks for the correction...ehehe..
so anyway, i'm a fan too, infact i even did this,uhm, searching, for cofibean's friendster account...and i'm curious, seo ba talga un ha cofi? hehehe..
about that, timyap (i love the "real" tim yap),pity the poor guy..even if he's like a, hmm, TIMawa,tao paren un.hayaan mo na. or better yet,give him something for his BO. a perfume or an albatros or something (nahahawa ako seo cofi) ahihi..and for the talsik laway, la ako maisip eh...ilagan mo nalang?.. (--,)

Anonymous said...

kumpirmado mga tol... si dalaifollower at cofibean ay iisa lang!!!

Anonymous said...

fuck you dalaifollower!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

sana magpost na din si cofibean ng picture nya para malaman natin kung TIM YAP din ba sya or hindi.

Anninnokko said...

It seems like Cofibean has resurrected and his dark aura is back!

Welcome back Sith Lord! :) More.....

Mo√ęt♥ said...

Gross.

glue said...

At last, a nice entry of bashing. It's long overdue. The recent posts were kinda flat. This one is funny and I love the TIM YAP acronym. More goodies, cofi!

gillboard said...

TIM YAP (Tang Inang Mukha Yan Ang Panget)... Classic! Hahaha...

reigne said...

as dr. miranda bailey put it --- > "you'll gonna be thankful for the stupidity of the human race"

Anonymous said...

"So I just made tahimik na lang and tried to focus more on making ilag na lang from all the tilamsik of his laway no."

hahaha!!!

dalaifollower said...

Freakin' anonymous, thank you! :)
U R 1 OF A KIND--- TANGA! HIHIHHIIH.... I HAVE TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE FACT THAT WITH UR EXISTENCE, THE UNIVERSE HAS MAINTAINED ITS EQUILIBRIUM. MY BRILLIANCE IS SUSTAINED THRU EXTREME COMPARISON. HAHA
TOLBOTS!

eiss said...

i love harry potter. Pero posting the whole story as a comment? come on! nakakasira ata ng araw un!

Anonymous said...

ikaw at si www.blurty.com/~caffeinerush ay iisa! :o

Anonymous said...

haha...Tim Yap..Dami ko kilala na gnun...^_~*

lizzie said...

tang-ina cofibean you're the best!!! wuhoo! shiznit ka! love yah!

islaw said...

Brilliant! Bravo, Cofibean, bravo!

TIM YAPS should burn in hell.

Panatiko said...

Seriously din pare, you should write na a book. As in now na! I'll bet an arm and a leg na it'll sell like hot cakes! Galing mong writer dude coming from the genre of Bob Ong. Wala ako masabe. Two thumbs up for being a very good/effective writer. Start monetizing your blog noh!

Anonymous said...

So kaka naman itong blog na ito. As in ewww! Kadire the laway ha.

Anonymous said...

Welcome back cofi! Tagal ko nag-antay ng update from you. Galing mo talaga! Hope makita kita ng personal.

Anonymous said...

please po approve nyo naman ang mga comments ko. kahit man lang sana isa. i wanna be part of this effing cool site.

Anonymous said...

Kung talagang mayaman ka, bakit wala kang dalang digital camera man lang to show the people your riches. I bet isa kang bulaan. Wala kang yagbols! Duwag!

Anonymous said...

Ang galing mong komedyante cofibean. Bakit hindi ka kaya maglayas?

Anonymous said...

Ang tanga naman ng nagpost na pinopost daw ni cofibean ang picture ng Harry Potter.

Nicolo said...

Nice one. I love the TIM YAP term. LOL! Mula ngayon gagamitin ko na yan.

Anonymous said...

Grabe ha! Ngayon lang ako natuwa sa mga blogs na nababasa ko. Mostly kasi ay puro seryosong bagay at boring yung mga nakasulat. This one is... I can't describe the feeling.. Basta I LOVE IT! Keep it up. Fan mo na ako!

Anonymous said...

Cofibean, meron ka bang friendster? Post mo naman email mo para ma-add ka namin dito sa office. Madami kang fan dito.

Serial Killer said...

TANG-INA KANG KUPALOIDS KA. KUNG MAGSALITA KA KALA MO IKAW LANG ANG ANAK NG DIYOS. HINDI LANG SPAMMING ANG AABUTIN MO SAKEN GAGO! PAG NAKITA KITA, BABALATAN KITA NG BUHAY GAMIT ANG ISANG MAPUROL NA BLADE. MASAHUL KA PA SA HAYUP. HAYUP KA!

Anonymous said...

Whats up dude with the bitterness ba? Cool ka lang. Baka atakehin ka sa puso nyan. Lagi kang hayblad.

Anonymous said...

Nice game. Bakit nga kaya walang nakaisip gumawa ng laro na iiwas ka sa laway? You're really brilliant cofibean! Baka next time ay may madinig na kaming kulto na dinidyos ka.

Anonymous said...

Isa kang HENYO! Nice blog.

Anonymous said...

Kawawa naman ang mga panget sa mundo. Meron ng tawag sa kanila. Sabagay, at least hindi masakit pakinggan. Mas gugustuhin ko pang matawag na tim yap kesa outright na panget ang itawag saken. Ahihi.

Victory said...

Pare, baka pagsisihan mo ang pang-lalait sa mga tao balang araw pag binawi na ni Lord ang buhay mo. Tandaan mo na isa lang ang buhay natin at ito ay sinusukat sa panahon na tawagin na nya tayo. Sa tingin mo ba ay makakapunta ka sa langit sa mga sinasabi mo dito sa blog mo? Hope hindi ka totoong tao and hope na hindi mo gusto ang mga nasusulat dito.

Anonymous said...

Cofibean, panalo ka talaga! Idol ka for life!

Anonymous said...

Sayang naman. Additional hits din kahit na mga katutubo ang pumupunta dito. Sana hindi mo na tinangal yung Pinoytopblogs button. Dun ko kasi nadiscover itong blog mo eh. Hirap kayang mapasama kahit sa top 100 man lang.

Anonymous said...

hope makapag-publish ka ng libro ng makilala ka na namin sa personal. dati pa kasi ako naiintriga kung sino ba talaga si "cofibean". Kung tao ba sya o grupo ng mga tao. At kung totoo ba sya o kathang isip lang ng isang henyong manunulat. nais din sana kitang maging guro kung paano magkaroon ng isang matagumpay na blog na tulad nito. hanggang dito na lang. mabuhay ka!

Anonymous said...

Sana naman wag kang masyadong mayabang dude. Nakakasira sa image mo yan. Ikaw rin baka mamya ay malaman ni Tim Yap ang blog mo at ikaw ang papangitin sa gulpe. Gusto mo ba yun?

Anonymous said...

Ang pinagtataka ko lang ay kung bakit nabawasan naata ang callcenter bashing. Bakit nga ba cofibean?

TANGINAMO said...

Hindot ka. Tangina mo!!!! Mamatay ka na!

Anonymous said...

Nice post. Now, I'm beginning to love you. Keep it up!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Grabe chong! Kung publisher lang ako baka offeran na kita para bilhin ang rights dito sa blog mo. Tiyak na yayaman ako dito. Kaso hindi eh. kaya sorry na lang saken. Wakekeke!

Jennifer said...

ah! meron palang nang-iispam kaya hindi na-aaprove yung mga comments ko sayo last time sa entry mo. hope maapprove na ito.

alam mo cofi, number 1 fan moko dito sa iloilo. hope mapadpad ka dito. sagot ko na lahat sa gagastusin mo kahit na tirahan. basta ba makilala lang kita.

also, i emailed you something. jennifer name ko. hope magreply ka.

Anonymous said...

Grabe chong! Kung publisher lang ako baka offeran na kita para bilhin ang rights dito sa blog mo. Tiyak na yayaman ako dito. Kaso hindi eh. kaya sorry na lang saken. Wakekeke!

Anonymous said...

Kakaaliw naman dito. Sayang ngayon ko lang nadiscover itong blog na ito. You've earned a fan here cofi. Galeng!

Anonymous said...

Sino ba si PARE? Isa ba itong imaginary na friend ni Cofibean o kay "pare" nya inaalay itong blog na ito. Bading ba si cofi? Just asking lang pow. :D Also, sino ba si Hilariously Stoopid?

Anonymous said...

Sino ba si PARE? Isa ba itong imaginary na friend ni Cofibean o kay "pare" nya inaalay itong blog na ito. Bading ba si cofi? Just asking lang pow. :D Also, sino ba si Hilariously Stoopid?

Anonymous said...

Iba ka talaga idol! Galing ong magpaalis ng stress. Tanggal ang sama ng loob at sakit ng ulo ko pag nababasa ko itong blog mo. Aprub na aprub!

Anonymous said...

Uy! Thats bad ha! Calling the filipinos katutubos. For all you know, we talk better english than you. Your also a filipino right? Also, lessen down the fropanity. Its not good. Its hard to enter heaven when you have too much hatred inside youre heart. God bless!

Anonymous said...

Magkano kaya kinikita ni cofibean sa blog na ito when it comes sa google adsense? Tangina. Guess you're filthy rich na dude. What are you waiting for? Publish a book na!

Apple said...

TIM YAP = priceless! >:)

Jennifer said...

cofibean, i've sent you an email. hope magreply ka. Ingats ka lage. luvyah!

Bi-boy said...

Add mo naman ako ddue sa friendster - cute_bud69@yahoo.com. Idol kita kasi pare! I think this guy is in love with you na nga pare!

Anonymous said...

Sabi nila nakakainis daw itong blog na ito. Bakit ni hindi man lang ako nainis ng basahin ko ang entry mo. Actually, nahirapan nga akong huminga. Hindi dahil sa hayblad kundi dahil sa kakatawa. Pwede kang stand-up comedian PARE. Mas malaki ang kikitain mo doon kesa magpublish ng riblo. Kawawa naman si Tim Yap. :)

Anonymous said...

Pare, check mo itong site na ito. Merong chick na gumagaya sayo. Obvious na copycat. Sabunutan mo bilis!

----

http://moetlove.blogspot.com/

Moet ♥ said...

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

O my god! You make my pekpek like dripping wet na no! its like click my blog na no and see who's like major blogger diba? i think my blog is uber cool than urs diba? plus pa na libre pa totnak sa wet pussy ko diba. as in! Don't mind the second rate trying hard copycat i'm doing ryt now diba? just click me na lang no and see how great of a mang gagaya i am kaya.

Guys, please visit my site ok? I'm like mas magaling kay cofi. Pramis.

With bonus pa na libreng kantot sa 100th visitor ko. So what are you waiting guys? click my link na. Tara lets bagets!

Please.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

dalaifollower said...

ei guys! dont you think nagkamali si MOET sa pag spell ng name nya?
---------HAHAHHAHAH!

TIM YAP din , I bet her own life on this.

cofi, maganda ang ideya ng kulto, gawin mo na akong organizer ng sacrifices at uunahin ko si MOET, hihihihihih.........

blog entry na to parang reviewer ng exam katuwa balik balikan dami learnings.gifted with insight tlga to c cofi, cgro isa kang ermitanyo!

tama ba ako?

dalaifollower said...

at kung too ka mang ermitanyo, papalitan ko na name ko --->>
DALAKOCOFI

puta-ka-moet said...

tangina mo mo moet!!!! pakantot ka na lang sa aso!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

ok lang sana chong yung trip mo, medyo nakaka aliw... kaya lang ayusin mo naman grammar mo, para di obvious na pretender ka lang. (kaya ka siguro galit sa mga taga call center. frustrated callcenter agent-wannabe ka ba?) just asking =)

moet girl said...

gross...

you guys are disgusting..
that's so not me up there^

check my profile. I'm moet girl not moet♥

hahahaha..
assholes kayo.
dumb assholes.

mo? said...

wow pare your balik na..XP u made me hintay so tagal naka2bored na rin kc blog ni bb pare ..buti pa sayo may kunting sense i thought tim yap has something to do with HP pare..they made u inis lang pala..dapat u tell straightly to that TIM YAP pare na kambal nya c shrek..isama narin sa dictionary ung TIM YAP..ur so brilliant tlaga~ sana lang hnde once in a blue moon ung pagpost mu hanggang sa muli! beware mga epal
hoy sori kung double post hangets kc notebook q pare

the angelic new soozyhopper said...

hay naku, go na kayo sa
http://soozzyhopper.blogspot.com para malaman nyo once and for all kung cno si cofibean kung i-feature cya ni Soozy babe.

Anonymous said...

Ang dami talagang second rate trying hard copycat sa mundo. Even the infamous soozyhopper ay meron ng gumagaya. Sad to say, the now defunct soozyhopper.blogspot.com is no more to defend its reputation. Good thing there's a syndicated blog at livejournal. Go to this blog to see the difference between the original and the mang-gagaya --- http://soozyhopper.livejournal.com. The original talks about the rumors concerning the alta sociedad. The copycat talks nothing but showbiz crap and more shit. Kaya kung ako sayo SOOZYHOPPER WANABEE... Die now! As in now na!

Police Enforcer said...

Ginagawa ng advertisers block itong comment box ni cofibean para sa mga loser blogs na gustong sumikat. Now that's pathetic. U guys are ruining the fun of his site. Please post your crappy sites somewhere else. Try nyo sa Pinoytopblogs. Tignan natin kung makarating yang site nyo kahit na 200th place lang. I bet baka 201 pwede pa. And to dalaifollower, keep your comments na lang to yourself. Masyadong obvious na cofibean fanatic ka.

wordgasm said...

i make quality websites. depends if i'd like you then might make you one for free.. but since i've been to this site just now then might as well see whats gonna happen. btw. you sound gay. are you gay? no offense.. :p

dalaifollower said...

TO POLICE ENFORCER:

WOULD YOU MIND KEEPING UR OPINION TO URSELF AS WELL?!
AND R U GOING TO ARREST ME FOOL FOR NOT HAVING POOR JUDGMENT LIKE YOU? WOW!

HERE, IS MY NOTEPAD, IL SAY WHAT I WANT TO SAY. I'L FUCK UR HEAD OFF IF I WNT TO. WHY THE HELL UR HERE ANYWAY. LET'S TAKE THIS WAR SOMEWHERE ELSE, I JUST ENLISTED MYSELF PALA SA ARMY HAHAHHAHA TADO!

☻orc encyclopedia☻ said...

This whole place is turnin into a freak show... or maybe it already is... lol!

1. Cyber Zoo - this blog... We've got orcs, monkeys, and now TROLLS (lol) complete with an entourage of native tribesmen, police enforcers, and assassins... need I say more?

... and it all started here :)

... and that is why I think the Philippines will be great someday - because its ability to redefine the world (whether creative or destructive), despite its misfortunes, is undoubtedly inexorable and perhaps even infinite.

How we can turn tragedy into entertainment and vice-versa is a big mystery.

Anonymous said...

If you're such a tough guy, why do you have to pretend to Claude and her new boyfriend.

A real attitude kinda guy would tell it like it is, instead of pretending to be someone else.

Me, I would have just told my friend that I think the guy is ugly and stinks. But if she wants to be with him, it's her choice, and as a friend all I can do is support her choice.

But then again, you really have to be a tough and real person to do that.

If you're afraid, then you just play pretend.

ograbmi said...

wahaha. everythings funny.

garytarugo said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Really nice blog. I've seen so many conio blogs before pero your blog rulez! Galing ng wicked humor!

Anonymous said...

Hahahaha! Iba ka talaga chong! Ang galing mong gumawa ng mga istorya. Now I dont know kung totoo ka ba o hindi. Nalilito na ako. Pero one thing is for sure --- ikaw ang the best writer na nakilala ko! Pilit ginagaya pero di mapantayan. GAwa ka na kase ng riblo!

Anonymous said...

Can somebody please hack this effing cool site. Tangna! Lets teach this fag a lesson.

Anonymous said...

Kakaiba itong blog na ito. Combination of Jessica Zafra, Mr. Bean and Ally Mcbeal. Bakit libro pa ang gagawin mo if you could earn more sa tv series. ;)

xxx Art xxx

wosie said...

i love the tim yap acronym!!! panalo! =)

Anonymous said...

ei, thanks for making my day by making me laugh. although i don't really agree with some of your "writing styles". However, i still think that you are great at entertaining your readers with that style, which is why your 'ka-konyohan' really works. Cheers!

(i wonder if what you write here is just out of plain mischief or if this is really your personality...)

Anonymous said...

Cofibean is fake. Consider:

1. He doesn't show any pictures of himself. Even family members. Even so-called friends.

2. All the photos on his post are from google.

3. His sosyal English is so "noveou riche" (i hope I spelled this right). The real old rich don't have time to blog. They travel, they shop, they actually don't go to offices. They have countless minions to do earn money for them. They don't mention their drivers. Those things are part of their lives from day one. It's nothing to brag about.

And they don't use the word "pare". They even live simple lives you may not recognize them unless you know them personally.

Noel

yna said...

and so i found cofibean. utakgago was talking about you the last time.

anyway, you're one of a kind, really. you're the only blogger that i've seen [so far] whoi detests some comments [not all, really]. but you got a point there, lousy comments are totally nuts in this blog.

Anonymous said...

nouveau.

starcraft said...

a good writer indeed...

isn't it about time you write a book and make known your ability for writing?

it would be a waste of talent if you plan to confine your works within the constrictions of cyberspace

IonFluxh said...

noel i think cofibean is real..hes a kid so i dont think that the way he talks depicts nouveau riche..

Anonymous said...

I found your blog while browsing Manuel L. Quezon III's blog. Grabe! Pawala na talaga ang Pilipino.

PG said...

bobo talaga to si cofibean.si shrek wala naman sa disneyland sa universal studios yun.hahahahhaha!pasosyal na pulubi!!!

Anonymous said...

as always, your writing is clever and your wit is sharp. thanks for making my day, i laughed so hard at your recent posts. keep it up, please!

Anonymous said...

this blog is like perpetuating haters and discrimation amongst his brothers. i ask u? where is the love?

Anonymous said...

---I mean, its obvious na he DON'T have any idea on who I am diba pare. -----social ka ba tlg??!! pki ayos grammar mo HA... MALI MALI EH.. wag maxado magpanggap.... haha wtf..

Marcus Raven said...

Pinoy satire at its finest. Galing! I hate the real Tim yap also. I hope you don't really talk the way you write... do you?

Anonymous said...

I don't mind you making fun of all the inadequate people you see around you... But that leaves me to wonder how a certified gliterati as you say you are, act or behave in such a manner.

Plus, what's with the Taglish thing? A suave and primo guy like you should know how to speak or better yet write straight, grammatically correct English.

With the way you're talking... You sound like a definite bakla katutubo yourself... No doubt about it!

Anonymous said...

dalaifollower is certified gay... you folks shouldn't be listening to this "one"... if you're homophilic you should stay away.
kudos to cofi!

Anonymous said...

You truly are a character cofi bean.

Received your link from an email. I wonder if we've ever met or if I've ever seen you in mass at Forbes

Anonymous said...

you shit ass racist self centred egoist bastard...

Anonymous said...

Jessica Zafra male version si cofi. hehehe

Anonymous said...

ang saya ng language mo. haha!

Anonymous said...

to cofibean: dude bakla ka ba?

kasi your comments and writing style are so kris aquino 'noh!

ina mo upakan kita e BADING!

Obliterate GEEK FAGGOTS!

fernando said...

i bet cofi is hot.. is he? i would like to meat him some day.



- seattles