Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Acura

Wow pare! At long last, my mom fired na the stupid old native driver Mang Tonyo. It's about time naman kasi pare no. I mean he's too old na tapos bobo pa. He was making paawa pa kanina infront of my mom. Kadire talaga the scenario pare. Just try to imagine an old guy crying. The hell talaga pare! Really can't explain my happiness right now kasi nobody will cramp na my style from now on. Wala na the kulit Mang Tonyo who keeps on bothering me whenever I'm out partying. Bottom line --- I'm soo fucking saya now pare! Will tell you later why the old native got fired.

My dad kasi bought a new car for my mom last month as an anniversary gift. It's nothing mahal naman. The Honda Acura TSX. A 205 hp with 2.4 liter i-VTEC engine. The only cool thing about this car is technology they made sama with the car. I asked nga my mom if I could get na lang the 6-disc in-dash cd changer eh. Palit to my old skul cd player. Tutal it has other cool features naman eh. Like the bluetooth phone connectivity and the navigation system with voice recognition that is simply kainggit pare. Actually I'm planning na nga to make bangga my car para my dad will try to buy me the Acura TL which has an 8-speaker surround sound system.



So yun na nga diba? My mom really is enjoying her new car. She's no longer making sabay na nga with my dad eh. I think she has toyo na dahil she's fond na of borrowing Mang Tonyo and my Dad's driver, Mang Dario just to drive her around Makati. Dahil she feel safer daw with the two native drivers around to act as her bodyguards. She even asked my dad to hire for her some bodyguards na daw dahil you'll never know daw when the carnappers and kidnappers will strike. That's sooo fucking pathetic diba pare? Glad I'm not paranoid like her no.

Buti na lang yesterday they had a head on collision with a kia pride taxi with Mang Tonyo as her driver. Nothing to worry naman dahil they both made it alive. The car got a dent lang sa gilid aside from the busted bumper dahil nakaskas ng kadiring kariton from the masa sidewalk vendor. Don't get me wrong pare. I'm not happy because my mom's car got gasgas. it's just that, if not for that incident, my bobo native driver won't get fired kanina.

Aside from that LIBERATING incident, I have nothing else to talk about pare. Siguro tama na muna that for now.

And to the pathetic orc who keeps on sending the kadire photo to my email add. Fuck you pare!

76 comments:

gelins said...

aba.. i missed u are ah.. hehehe.. aww.. am gonna miss yer "mang tonyo rants" gudluck on planning to get a new car!

Anonymous said...

Tang-ina ka pare! Don't tell me that's the photo of your mom's car. Tang-ina ka! Kinopya mo lang yan sa internet no! Hambog ka! Bobo!

Anonymous said...

Mr. Cofibean, welkam bak! Miss na miss na kita. Kaso mamimiss ko din si Mang Tonyo dahil wala na sya. Diba sya ang taya mo?

Anonymous said...

Ey cofi, bakit ganun? Halos lahat ng pinopost kong comments ay hindi mo inaapprove? Was there anything wrong? Don't tell me you dont understood what I say to you in those messages. Grow up pare! Ur nothing without ur money. I bet your also the orc you are claiming.

Anonymous said...

Mamimiss ko si Mang Tonyo. Yun pa naman ang pinakagusto kong character dito sa mundong kinatha mo cofibean. Sana ibalik mo sya.

Neliopot said...

i dig you pare!you rock! bigtime!

Anonymous said...

Hello! Acura is soo cheap kaya! My gosh! I knew it! As in I KNEW IT! You are the poser one! Kadiri u no! Gosh!

Anonymous said...

Cofibean, pag nakabili ka ng bagong kotse, sex tayo sa loob ha? Buntisin moko ng limang beses! Please!

Anonymous said...

Sa wakas! Bagong post. Kaso kakalungkot. Kasi wala na si Mang Tonyo. Kawawa naman. Naku! Ingat ka lang cofibean, baka may bumagga sa yo sa susunod na mga araw. Nyahahaha!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

just wonder lang mr.cofibean . i tot ur rich and runnin a family bussiness then why bother to make bangga or ur car para ur dad will buy u one dba? afford mo naman eh. don't tell me na ur not having ur sahod dats why ur wishing na make bungo of ur car???

just really wonder. anyway.. bat wla na c mang tonyo? unti unti na nawawala kontravida sa buhai mo ah :-> pati c chronicles of naida nawala na .. ano kaya next ?? hehehe

jeniperr said...

Dude. Hahaha. Namiss ko ang post mo ha! Wow. New car? Kainggit naman. Hahaha.

Anonymous said...

Oh my god! hanggang ngyn ur still alive and fucking!? until now ur trying to get attention?! putok ka ba sa buho at kulang sa pagmamahal at atensyon!? no wonder!

Anonymous said...

Bored now.

Anonymous said...

Kaya pinaalis si Mang Tonyo ng nanay mo kasi may relasyon na sila ni Mang Dario... kukurukuku, kadyot lang, kadyot lang.

Anonymous said...

i really enjoy reading your BLOG. it's so hilarious kaya. i heart cofibean bigtime

Anonymous said...

yuck.. boring na ng blog mo. inantok ako.

maye said...

ayos.. akala ko wala ka na entry, at akala ko nawala blog mo.. pero ayan! buhay na ulit siya.. ;) ahaha.. kawawa naman si mang tonyo.. tsk.

Diana said...

Sa nagpost na boring daw ang blog ni cofibean, gusto mo sabunutan ko bulbol mong orc ka? Nyeta! Hinahayblad ako sayo. Please lang no. Tantanan mo nga ang blog na itong bruha ka no! Ano! Sabunutan na lang!

----------------------------------

COFIBEAN SOLID: CALOOCAN CHAPTER

Anonymous said...

Kawawa naman si Mang Tonyo. Nalulungkot ako ngayon dahil sa pinost mo cofibean. Bakit ka ganito? Sadista ka! Animal! Animal!

rd said...

benta mga entries mo! so amusing! hehe
gud luck!

Anonymous said...

fuk you -dumb ass believer of bullshit=>COFIBEAN SOLID: CALOOCAN CHAPTER<=

Chauvinist-ah! said...

oh...

how sadistic.
how apathetic.

well... that's okay. if it's true, then, reality does have something to tell, pare.

i don't blame you for wanting others creep for some pain whatsoever. you are one helluva person. and you speak for it. astig!

hail!

i respect your freaky opinions. :-)

Ang totoong hamon sa buhay ay ang pagpapakatototoo.

:-)

YOU ROCK PARE!

tama lang 'yan. e kung namatay mom mo who's to blame?

Anonymous said...

hihihihi so nakakatawa naman ateng. for all i know you wanted mang tonyo out because you preferred a young and macho driver ahihihihi

Anonymous said...

cofibean..
boring na talaga.. wala nang magic... bakit ba?

Takot ka ba sa kanila.. okie lang yan... 'di ka naman ganyan before...

maging hayok ka sa mga kasamaan.. diyan ka sumikat eh...

i'm expecting more next time..

glammedupemogal said...

i missed ur posts!! haha.. welcome back.. =]

keep on postin.

elle said...

grabe pare, super cool talaga that car of your mommy ah. your daddy is some kind of a sweet ah. sige na, i shall go na muna and make sagasa my kabarkada's yachtboat. XP hahaha! -elle

Anonymous said...

I never thought there were losers in the world until I read your blog.... Ummmm.... could die or something? The world be a better place that way.

Anonymous said...

Ano bang pake nyo sa blog ni cofibean. Hay naku! Mr. Cofi, wag mo na pansinin ang mga yan. Kulang lang yan sa pansin kasi yung blog nila ay nilalangaw. Ahihi!

Anonymous said...

...kmukha m ba c mang tonyo!???
...hihi<3

Anonymous said...

yakkkks...japanese car...

Anonymous said...

cofibean is God

Anonymous said...

i can't believe that people like you exist. i pity your biological mom, di ka niya pinalaki ng tama. sayang ang talino mo kse hindi mo ginagamit ng tama...

kawawa ka naman.

Casey said...

And finally you updated your blog! so boring naman na...but still no pics of you...sigh!

Anonymous said...

you seriously need to grow up. please, it's kinda obvious that those who are rooting for you are either sadistic and sarcastic, or your pitiful alter-ego's. My god, you know naman PARE it's so not normal tto speak like that. It is either you are extremely ignorant, or a gay guy who hasn't come out of the closet (not that i have anything against the gay society, but you make it sound so.. goddamn annoying). PARE, the hell is wrong with you, PARE.

Nice try, you stupid prick.

And oh, PARE, i don't know if you are really that stupid, or just plain sadistic, but taking the "make povery history" your way (as in the apathetic and ignorant way), makes me sick. Nobody has the right to demean others, and DEFENITELY NOT you. PARE naman, you're like, so jologs ha. So not in. Eww, like so kadiri naman.

Go shove your tongue on your ass, stupid git.

I can't believe you graduated, and is currently in the communications society. Who ever accepts you in their company, PARE they have to be as ignorant and as stupid as you PARE. Birds of the same feather flock together right PARE?

It's been nice knowing you. you've been a great help releasing stress and anger. Hope to hear from you again.

XOXOXO,

Your Number 1 fan, PARE.

Anonymous said...

OMFG PARE taga ateneo ka?

Ikaw na ang next na taong itataboy ng Ateneo.

Hope you approve of this PARE kasi i'm like, in love with you na PARE.

Anonymous said...

cofibean tsong...i can relate talaga!we also have a bobo driver.i so look forward to your kwentos!
sige tsong,i'll make pilit my daddy to sipa our driver too!

-BPS

Anonymous said...

elo i em a fekin bobo orc and i kem ere from dizney land

Anonymous said...

yaiks cofibean. di ba mayaman kayo? why settle for an asian-made car?:p i'd be insulted if i were your mom! hihi. peace!

Anonymous said...

TO XOXOXO (Cofibean's #1 Fan),

Mepagka-tanga ka. Ateneo should be proud to have Cofibean in their alumni list. Sa tingin mo bobo si Cofi? Have you read his previous blogs (not this one, this one is kinda boring, his angst is missing)? He is a fucking genius. He writes like the devil. He is a very smart human being. Di tulad mo, you can't spell. Case in point: "DEFENITELY NOT." The correct spelling is: Definitely. Look it up! Cofi is definitely NOT bobo. He may be sarcastic, sadistic, narcissistic and whatever negative adjectives you want to throw in, he may be all those things but he definitely is NOT bobo. He got on everyones nerves, mad a lot of people mad enough to threaten to kill him but he is very entertaining and funny. His word play is amazing. Not like yours. You're boring. Learn how to use the dictionary next time or you can use the spell checker feature on your word program. If you don't like what you read here, read Cofi's disclaimer. Kung hindi mo maintindihan what his disclaimer means, find a friend with a higher IQ than you and ask them to explain it to you. Thank you.

Cofi's avid reader: qwerty

Anonymous said...

My gawd pare! You are such an effective writer! Ang galing! Pure brilliance!

Casey said...

Even though Cofibean gets into my nerves, still can't get enough of his (Mis)adventures....pakita ka na kse noh!

Anonymous said...

Your blogs can become a television show. patok to pare! Lol!

cofibean solid!

-pulubi

Anonymous said...

hay naku.... parang ikaw rin ang nasa site na to ah http://addisforhomos.blogspot.com/
may pagkapareho ang style nyo eh... o kaya cugro kapatid mo nho??? pero okay ang talent mo... galing mong mang asar he he he... cheap naman ng car na napili mo, kahit sana Lexus man lang pede na sana....

Anchie said...

There are some people talaga na walang originality. Kakalungkot. Im referring to this one --> http://addisforhomos.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

i'm sorry but i do not see any similarity between cofi and this dude from "http://addisforhomos.blogspot.com/ " who i think is making fun of eli soriano? who is eli soriano?

Anonymous said...

Ano ba yan? Obvious na nakikiride sa site ni cofibean para magkaroon ng traffic sa site nila. Ang papathetic ha? Sus!

aMbUsH101 said...

Cofibean, you brighten up my day. If I weren't married, I would have hunted you down and married you.

Anonymous said...

do u really think people give a fuck what u have to say? "pare"???

Anonymous said...

you are the reason why your society and your present culture will never make any advancements up the "progress ladder". i find no humour or entertainment-value in your "blogs". you do not amuse me. i suggest you climb up a high staircase and dive headfirst, PARE

Anonymous said...

what's an orc?

Beckay said...

akala ko pa naman mayaman ko, recently lang kau nag ka Acura? eh db matagal na itong uso? he hehe.. sa abroad.. sana bumili ka agad nito as soon it was release in the market...

Hien said...

Some of your posts are very ironic.

mischarmed said...

hey..nice blog. ;) u make my day.

Anonymous said...

baka may relasyon yung mommy mo at ung gma drivers nyo kaya she's fond of making hiram your drivers!!! haha. napakakitid ng utak mo! kung talagang edukado ka, hindi ka ganyan manlait! nakakahiya... nagpapatakbo ka pa naman ng business kuno nyo.. tsktsktsk.

Anonymous said...

if i know pobre ka lang!!!harhar!!sige!!!tingnan natin kung sinong masmayaman!!!

only friend said...

you know what? you're the most annoying blogger ever. you try too much. You're language is soo annoying. Could you straighten up your tongue. I swear it's really annoying.

Anonymous said...

hahahahay! 1st time ko d2! napakasaya!

Anonymous said...

i hope you approve this.

buti nga umalis yung driver nyo because i think na he couldn't stand your obnoxious personality.

DUMBASS. GO TO HELL.

Anonymous said...

i hope you approve this.

buti nga umalis yung driver nyo because i think na he couldn't stand your obnoxious personality.

DUMBASS. GO TO HELL.

Anonymous said...

HONDA ACURA?? Cheap ha... yan lang ba kaya ng Parents mo... so nativeeeeeee bwahahahahahahahaha

Anonymous said...

You are not only making a mockery of yourself, but of your parents and your katutubo relatives too.

You call yourself an elite? And so I'd conclude that Atenistas are stupid.

Approve this pare.

Anonymous said...

You're so annoying! Please stop your coniotics accent! As in dah bah! get lost!

Anonymous said...

BOBO walang car na HONDA ACURA!!! ACURA is the American version of HONDA stupid dork!!

Berna said...

Bobo ng nagpost sa itaas. Acura is a brand name of Honda. Like you, a brand name of stupidity. GO check honda.com. :P

Anonymous said...

native drive wow!yabang mo naman,samantala SA mga PARENTS mo lang naman ikaw umaasa.........

Anonymous said...

yaks pare ang yabang mo namn pare...!!!akala mo kung sino ka???you're a gawk..!!d ka namn mag pakita "My dad kasi bought a new car for my mom last month as an anniversary gift. It's nothing mahal naman. The Honda Acura TSX. A 205 hp with 2.4 liter i-VTEC engine. The only cool thing about this car is technology they made sama with the car." yabang mo pare aHH??pangit ka namn?????????stupid asshole...!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

gago!!!! my civic si 2-door aq!!! anu kamong TL??? gago!!!! ung civic q engine swapped K22 ported to 2.6 liters with turbocharger and ems!!! my 557 hp @ 5629 rpms!!! gago!!! bagal mo!!!! my sony xplod subs and amps pa q!!!! gago!!!! see yah at car shows!!!! qualified k b???? d cguro kse acura tl mo stock na, mabagal pa!!!! ulol!!!! puro k hangin la nman batbat!!!! gago!!!! saksak mo susi ng acura mo sa ilong mo!!!!! punyeta ka!!!!!! ulol!!! gago!!!! tangina mo!!!!! hangin ka balasubas!!!!! no mtas ka saken!!! mas may style aq sau tanga!!!! pulubi!!!! sa recto ka na lng mamalimos!!!!! gago!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

mas maganda po ang nissan 350z q kaysa sa honda civic nung nsa taas at sa acura ng mahanging blogger na 2!!! puro kau hangin!!! la kau batbat!!! lolz!!! 739whp lang nman ung z q... super bilis!!! 0-100 kph in 4.87 secs palag??? nag 227kph pa q s nlex nun eh eh nakita aq ng pulis kya cnuhulan q sya ng 5000 pesos lng nman... mura n un... hoy mayari ng civic kita tyo mall of asia ubusan lahi tyo s drag ano??? hoy ihatecofi tapon mo na acura mo hanap ka ng mas mabilis pa dyan!! nagmumuka kang pulubi eh!!!!

Anonymous said...

Yabang mo bro! Karera tayo ng beetle ko, lalampaushan ung acura mo!!! Kung gusto mo ung Chevy Nova ko para kumain ka ng alikabok! Hayup ang yabang mo!!! Tama nga sila, saksak mo susi ng acura mo sa ilong mo, baka sakaling maayos pagsasalita mo!!!

Anonymous said...

FU!

Anonymous said...

Pare ko, ung naka 350z, karera tayo...magakano? 739hp ha...tignan natin, sabihin mo lang kung kailan, di lang pala si cofibean ang mayabang, ikaw din, 396 Chevy nova, supercharged, 4.87 secs ha... tignan natin, fastest car sa subic drag to bro, magkano pusta, pwedeng pwede ako kahit saan, 227 kph-saya ka na dun, ako 190 sa coastal matraffic kasi, o nga pala MILES per hour un, Muscle cars kasi don't come with cheap km/hr dials...post molang kung kailan and magkano!!! Gago, tinira mo ung kaibigan ko ha, hintay ko sagot mo bugok!!!

Anonymous said...

you previously had a driver to take you to parties?

looooooosssseeeeeer! with a capital fuckin' L!

and geez, an acura is such a cheap crap of a car. you're not mister high society, you're worse than an orc!

Anonymous said...

hey cofibean whats up? pasakay naman sa bagong acura mo hehe

Karen Dee said...

great job on the posts. i like the site :)

Anonymous said...

haha funny dude!
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