Thursday, December 01, 2005
The monkey family.
December 1 is considered as World AIDS Day. So to hell with all those filthy AIDS carriers!
My mom told me kanina to go with my stupid relatives to Duty Free Paranaque. Eh my stupid mother kaya knows na I have something to do later with friends. So I made sabi to her, "Ma, I'll go out with Andrew and Claude later. Diba nga we will look na for some relief goods for the employees natin this Christmas?" Tapos my mom told me na it's been taken cared of na raw by Ibyang. Ibyang is her stupid secretary. Actually, she's like Night of the Living Dead na pare. As in living relic of ancient history talaga. In the flesh!
So yun na nga diba? I have no choice na naman but to abide with the fucking maternal commandments. It was really like pampasira na naman ng aura. Imagine, I'll drive some stupid people to Duty Free Paranaque like a bunch of bakasyonistas eh they all look so local naman. So I was really inis kanina. I told pa nga my stupid mom na why don't she go with them na lang kaya and borrow my useless native driver Mang Tonyo to drive them. Since I can drive na naman. I'm like malaki na kaya. And I can drive na naman and don't need pa a stupid driver right by my side all the time. Especially, that old, good for nothing katutubo, Mang Tonyo. Fuck talaga! Another perfect day ruined na naman diba.
But what can I do? It's my mom who told me that. I'm afraid she'll cut na naman the payments to my monthly dues at my credit cards. Diba pare that's double foul na? I mean, I'm not a driver naman no. I'm too goodlooking to become a driver. And besides, I literally disowned naman that part of our family tree eh. They are all so ugly kaya. Tapos they'll ride pa with me. Ano me, travelling zoo? Kadiri talaga pare. Still I have no choice but to follow the family's matriarch. Damn!
So yun na nga diba? I was the most gwapo driver in the world kanina to a bunch of monkeys. Tapos they are all so ingay pa. I mean, can't they see na I was like uber simangot kanina while driving. Tapos my stupid Auntie pa keeps on talking to me like wala lang. Feeling close! Fuck talaga! If only I could make her tulak outside the car, I just did siguro. The hell!
At dutyfree, Filipino mentality talaga really shows. Kadiri talaga the people there. I mean, what's with the panic buying ba? Eh all the items kaya inside duty free are readily available naman now at some major malls. If only I knew that I'll get to brush shoulders with some baho Domestic Helpers with their squatting brood, I should have dropped the family of monkeys at SM Sucat and will just fetch them like after a week na lang sana. Para my aura can like rest na from all the ingays no. Shit talaga. One good thing that happened lang is when I saw one brand of perfume there. I really can't stop laughing talaga pare. I mean, Paris Hilton now has her own Brand of Perfume with her pic pa on the box! How pathetic. Tsk.. Tsk.. Well, why ba me affected? I mean.. it's her life naman no. So, why should I give a damn at that bitch eh I have a family of monkeys to worry pa pala inside the fiesta mall. The hell pare!
Since I was there na naman, I thought of shopping na rin. One good thing about Duty Free is that it's tax free so it's kinda mura. But I won't allow myself to be like the native pinoys who's been panic buying no. It's not Judgement Day pa naman pare. So I bought na lang for myself some Loreal products like Tec Ni Art Fix Anti-Frizz and Thermo Fixing spray, a couple of perfumes and a bag of chocolates. I've been craving kasi for chocolates for the past few days eh. Kasi I read an article saying that Chocolates can alleviate you from the pit of depression daw. More like a feel-good-food pare.
Katakot pa nga the guy offering the bag of chocolates to me eh. Kadiri kaya his face. It's like survivor pare ng Hiroshima bombing. Like he was standing infront of a glass building when the explosion happened. I mean, what's with the humongous craters ba sa face? Its casting some shadows kaya under the bright light. And I think I saw pa nga some water with kiti-kitis na inside one of the craters no. And why work pa as a salescrew if you will scare naman all your customers away? Me nga muntik na mapasigaw when he suddenly appeared from behind the shelves eh. I said, "Ngii!" na lang right in his face tapos left. Creepy eh. As in kulang na lang talaga Awooo pare.
Well, the only consolation lang I got from the deal is that I haven't seen even a single Orc today. Yey me!
That's all na muna for now pare. I'm really tired na kasi.
Posted by ihatecofi at 10:23:00 AM